Urbane Bliss

Moving!

2010-12-02T15:42:00.000-08:00

So, life has gotten away on me... things have been SO busy. SO many changes and new things going on!

I promise to blog it, with pictures, but you'll have to visit my new blog: lisajones.ca

I am heading over there right now to blog the past 8 months (a very very abbreviated version)... so come check it out!

L.

Starting indoors.

2010-04-11T08:48:00.000-07:00

Last year I gave in to my spring fever and started indoors in early March. You green thumbs know that is FAR too early for some plants and many of mine ended up spindly.

So far this year I've maintained control...but it is time. I will be starting seeds today!

Here's what I am planting:

Mini cukes

Tricolour Swiss Chard

Alpine Strawberries

Thumbelina Carrots

AND Strawberry Spinach. If you haven't heard of Strawberry spinach before, you aren't alone. This is the first year I have seen it in the seed store. It looks so lovely that I have to try it. Here's a blurb about it:

Strawberry Spinach
Description Chenopodium capitatum
50 days.
Unusual and doubly enjoyable first as an edible green and later, the berries. Triangular, pleasantly textured, green leaves have spiky edges and grow in attractive, open rosettes. Mature plants produce berry-like, 1/2 inch, enjoyably nutty, ruby-colored fruit. Plants are heat loving for an excellent addition to summer salads This is a very rare ancient vegetable dating back 400 years! It was rediscovered at old monasteries in Europe.

It is similar to Lamb's Quarters in habit, although smaller. Grows 1 1/2 Feet high. Triangular, toothed leaves are thinner than spinach, very nutritious and high in vitamins. The tender shoots are used in salads or cooked like spinach. But the real surprise is that at each leaf axle there is an abundance of sweet, strawberry-like fruits which some say resemble mulberries. Will reseed vigorously.

We are getting all geared up to build our raised beds. Still not 100% sure what they will look like, or even what we are doing, but we're having fun and growing our own food. More seeds to come!

What did YOU plant this year?

Old Country Buffet - no longer a "Family" Restaurant

2010-04-06T07:23:00.001-07:00

I just read an article on 'Woman, Unsensored' about a Minnesota "family" restaurant who kicked a woman out for breastfeeding her baby.

http://womanuncensored.blogspot.com/2010/04/old-country-buffet-calls-police-on.html

I encourage you to read the article and if you were offended by the violation of this woman and child's human rights, to write a letter to Old Country Buffet.

Also, if you were a breastfeeding mother, did you experience any type of "resistance"?

I remember breastfeeding my son, in the foyer, very discretely (completely covered with a large blanket) at our former church while the nursing room was being renovated. Another MOTHER came up to me and told me I was inappropriate and instruced me to go breastfeed in the handicapped washroom (even though there were several wheelchair-bound and/or elderly people in the building).

I refused and she left in a huff saying I was making people uncomfortable!

While I understand that not everyone is comfortable with breastfeeding, many women wear clothing more revealing than the amount of breast exposed when I breastfed. Nobody would dream of asking them to cover up, so who do some people think it is their right to ask a woman to leave the room to feed her baby?

Comments?

Paraben health alert

2010-03-27T10:16:00.000-07:00

So, I just went through my bodycare products and chucked half of them.

I read an article (which turned into a quite a few articles, then studies) on parabens. Parabens are preservatives in many on the shelf body care products.

Chances are, you have parabens in your bathroom, whether in the lovely body lotion you smooth on after a shower or the conditioner you use in your hair. The problem with parabens is that they are xenoestrogens.

Xenoestrogens mimic estrogen in the body. Consuming/applying xenoestrogens can lead to toxicity. Some forms of cancer, especially women's cancers are fed by estrogens, so having something circulating in your body that mimics estrogen is not safe and can effect your health without you even knowing it.

Here is an interesting article on how to eliminate xenoestrogens in your home: www.ehow.com/how_4515846_avoid-exposure-xenoestrogens.html

There are a few brands of products that do not contain xenoestrogens. My favourite is Kiss my Face.

If you know of other paraben-free products, I would be interested in hearing about them!

Hemp Hearts

2010-03-22T07:44:00.000-07:00

So, believe it or not, I just stumbled onto this superfood a few weeks ago. My MOM introduced me to hemp heart.

5 tablespoons of shelled hemp seed has over 2g of GLA (gamma linoleic acid - Omega 3), 16 grams of protein and it will keep you full for HOURS. I sprinkle it on my fruit & yogurt in the morning and I am not hungry until well past 2pm. Plus it has a mild nutty taste and can be stirred or blended into just about anything.

I'd heard about hemp seed, but thought it was just for hippies (lo and behold)... have you ever tried it?

In the past 2 weeks, I have lost over 5lbs and my skin has cleared up (I had the lovely, post-children breakouts that never go away) so I'd say they are working!

Lurk Much??

2010-03-14T12:53:00.001-07:00

So, do you lurk? Do you read people's blogs without publicly following them? Are there people from your past who you cyber-stalk without their knowledge? Someone you're curious about?

Be honest, we all have people we wonder what happened to.

The thing is, there is no such thing as anonymity on the internet...right S? De-lurk, lady and let me know how J & S are doing...;)

Last week.

2010-03-08T12:59:00.000-08:00

Here's the Birthday Boy...5 years old on Sunday!

Think

2010-01-29T07:44:00.000-08:00

Howard Zinn 1922-2010:

“I'm worried that students will take their obedient place in society and look to become successful cogs in the wheel - let the wheel spin them around as it wants without taking a look at what they're doing. I'm concerned that students not become passive acceptors of the official doctrine that's handed down to them from the White House, the media, textbooks, teachers and preachers.”

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/01/29/2010-01-29_howard_zinn_influential_20th_century_historian_and_activist_dies_at_87.html

Allergies

2010-01-27T10:52:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I have to preface this post by saying that I never knew such a thing existed and I didn't know I had allergies really (I am sensitive to milk and have sensitive skin, but nothing anaphylactic).

All my life when I have done vigourous physical activity I break out in red, raised, itchy hives. I always thought it was the sizing in the clothes and made sure to wash them before wearing, but even that didn't seem to make a difference. I have avoided things that make me really sweat because of this... it is quite uncomfortable.

I have been trying hard to be more active, get more exercise and to just improve my overall health. I've been power-walking and break out in hives (usually on my chest, neck and legs), Jumped on the rebounder inside, hives, used the vibrational trainer, hives.

Last night I did 15 minutes of heavy activity and by the time I was done my arms, chest and neck were RED, itchy and my lips felt swollen.

I posted this on my facebook and a little while later thought to look it up (what would we do without google or Wikipedia?).

Exercise Urticaria

Exercise urticaria, sometimes mistaken as exercise allergy, itchy legs, itchy legs syndrome or itchy pants syndrome, is a form of urticaria that happens during exercise. It is characterized by itching, swelling or hives on the legs, arms, torso or neck during or after exercise.

Cholinergic urticaria is brought on by a physical stimulus. Although the physical stimulus might be considered to be sweat, the actual precipitating cause is increased body temperature. Lesions usually appear within a few minutes of sweating, and may last for 30 minutes to over an hour.
In extreme cases, the condition can progress to an anaphylactic reaction, causing the person to pass out or suffocate due to blocked airways. People suffering from cholinergic urticaria may carry an epinephrine autoinjector (such as an EpiPen) in case of anaphylaxis.

Exercise-induced anaphylaxis
A life-threatening drop in blood pressure that can be fatal in major allergic reactions. Seen commonly when a person allergic to certain foods or medications exercises immediately after ingesting them. Symptoms are:
Fatigue
Unusual warmth
Itching
Inflammation of the skin progressing to large hives
Collapse and unconsciousness
Swelling of the throat, difficulty breathing or choking
Nausea
Vomiting
Treatments include:
A self-injectable epinephrine kit prescribed by a doctor
Avoiding the triggering food or medication at least a day before vigorous exercise.
Medical alert jewelry or ID tags describing the condition and sensitive substances.
Accompaniment by someone informed of condition able to contact emergency service, like with an emergency telephone number.

I was shocked to learn that this is an actual disorder!?

I have no idea what I could have eaten yesterday that might have caused this.

I took two antihistamines and went to bed.

Does this ever happen to YOU? Is this common? I couldn't find any more information out about it.

100th Post!/ Mompetition

2010-01-19T17:11:00.000-08:00

Wow, I never really thought I would make it to 100 posts!

I don't think I realised how cathartic blogging would be for me. I have enjoyed sharing my life with all of you, and truly appreciate the replies I receive and the thoughts you share with me.

I've been thinking a lot, lately, about something that I've found really difficult about being a Mom - being real about what parenthood is really like and letting my guard down.

I think too many of us, especially me, are afraid that we'll be judged if we admit to other people that we aren't always perfect. I know I saw this a lot when Parker was first born... Alan called it a "Mompetition"... let's compete to see who has the most perfect house, hair, child, car, life...

It isn't a competition based on reality... it is a competition based on the image we project. For me, it is that I am always smiling... I even smile when I feel horrible, frustrated or sad.

I realise that keeping my reality hidden actually pushes me away from others because they can only relate to me when they are happy... and nobody is always happy.

Yesterday someone told me that another Mom (neither of which follow my blog) commented I was always happy and didn't think I'd be able to handle the honest reality of another group of Moms who routinely share their parenting frustrations.

I was surprised, at first, because I always think of myself as a pretty open person and I know that I can empathise with these other moms because I have plenty of parenting frustrations. What I didn't realise was that my constant forced happy demeanor was alienating me from a group of people with which I likely have a lot in common.

The more I thought about it, the more I realised that it isn't open, honest or helpful to only share your happiness with the people around you. Sometimes you need to let people see your sadness, your dissappointment or your anger/frustration.

I think when we share both our 'light' and 'dark' sides with people, allow ourselves a little vulnerability, we make it possible to take our relationships to a whole new level.

When we open ourselves up, others will do the same and we can relate to so much more of what they are experiencing, because we actually know what it is. Our 'sameness' brings us closer and our vulnerability too. Who doesn't want closer, more satisfying relationships with others? Who doesn't want to feel more understood?

I know I do.

So, I will start... I struggle with anxiety. I have only recently been able to put a label on the feeling... I always just thought I was just a worrier, but now I accept it is something more serious.

It has been a life-long problem and I struggle everyday not to worry about things that are totally out of my control. I lay awake in bed at night thinking about my kids and worrying about the future. I am not comfortable taking anxiety medication, so I am doing other things to try and cope.

There, I said it....

So, what do YOU think?? Have you ever felt like you couldn't be real with someone about what you're experiencing or feeling because they will judge you? Have you experienced 'Mompetition'? Do you have friends that you tell EVERYTHING to? Do you only project the positive?

Temper Tantrum...

2010-01-17T19:30:00.000-08:00

Do your kids have temper tantrums? Mine get mad but very rarely do they feel the need to lose control and scream and cry...tonight was one of those rare occasions.

Liam slapped his brother for the umpteenth time. He is in a hitting stage and I have no idea how to end it. I asked him to sit still and think about it for a few minutes. He complained, and whined and I know he was tired, so I told him that it was bedtime... this set-off 45 minutes of hollering and crying and the "I hate yous".

I should have explained that Liam is the world's biggest Mama's boy. I nursed that little milk monkey until he was 2 and a half and he'd still be nursing if it were up to him. We have a close and very special relationship, so it stung a little to be told he hates me 25 times in 10 minutes.

He finally told me he wanted me to go away, so I said I love you and started to stand up and he shreiked "WHERE are you GOING!!!???". I told him I was going away because he told me to and he started to cry and everything turned around.

I tried hard, throughout the tantrum to give him alternative words to use to express his feelings... I told him it was ok to tell me that he HATES what I am doing, or what is happening and that I knew he was feeling very very angry and that it was alright to tell someone that... I stayed calm, but it still stung.

I spent the next 30 minutes laying on the top bunk, reading 'Rainbow Fish' and and taking Sarah MacLaughlin requests (my kids like Miss Sarah), I rubbed his back and made up a song about him sliding down a rainbow with his 'Lamby', tucked him in and told him I loved him. He smiled and rolled over, the tantrum forgotten.

All is well and right in the Jones house...

What do YOU do when your child loses control?

I'll take the little things...

2010-01-15T07:35:00.000-08:00

Parker is loving his days at the blended program. Since returning from Christmas vacation he seems to have settled into a comfortable rhythm and his teachers say he is a joy to have in the classroom.

Yesterday when I picked him up after school the teacher took me aside to tell me a story.

Just before Christmas, Miss Mary was showing the children a Pysanka and left it on her desk when they moved on to their next class. The pysanka was broken and Miss Mary asked whoever was responsible to come forward. Nobody did.

Yesterday she found a small ceramic bird broken and told the class how dissappointed she was (she knew who'd broken it) and would appreciate if someone let her know. Nobody owned up to the bird, but she said on the way to gym class, Parker took her aside and told her that he was looking at her "amazing" pysanka before Christmas and he accidently dropped it. He told her how bad he felt and said he was so sorry.

She told me that it meant so much to her that Parker felt comfortable enough to come forward and tell her the truth.

We are looking online to find a new pysanka to replace her broken one. Parker told me that he would like to earn some extra money to buy it for her.

I am just so pleased that P came forward and fessed up. I had no idea about the egg and knowing that he made this decision on his own and followed through in an appropriate way tells me that he is growing up, that he feels comfortable and happy at his school and reminds me how much I like the person Parker is becoming!

Books

2010-01-06T15:14:00.000-08:00

So, we read, a lot.

The boys and I are reading Roddy Doyle - The Rover Adventures

I am enjoying it as much as the boys and we just finished Rover saves Christmas today before nap time (yes, I have reinstituted naptime. Frankly, at my age, I need a nap sometimes...;). I am SO looking forward to the next story.

When I met Alan, I was a reader and he told me he wasn't. Turns out, he was wrong.

Alan likes to read nearly as much as I do. Guess what book awoke the reader within him (think back to 1999, what was big)? He is currently reading the new Stuart Mclean Book and, now tat I have finished it, is looking forward to reading one of the books my Mum bought him for Christmas - 'Superfreakenomics' (I highly recommend this book. It will make you laugh a LOT and then think... well, not neccesarily in that order).

I used to read Anne Rice and VC Andrews and other scary/depressing/twisted types of books (not that there is anything wrong with reading something twisted once in awhile), but lately I find myself drawn to lighter reading.

So, recently I've read SCADS of vampire/werewolf/immortal/psychic teen lit. I am not ashamed to admit it... I have been into fantasy/sci-fi since I was a preteen.

I am currently re-reading the last Harry Potter book and quite enjoying it... it amazes me how much I forget of a story after I finish it!

So, what are YOU reading right now?? What are your favourite books?? Your kid's favourite books??

A New Year

2010-01-05T22:31:00.000-08:00

What a wonderful feeling this new year has brought with it.

I was feeling quite flat toward the end of December, but as the end of the month drew closer, I found that the stress of Christmas faded.

We did not drive to Radium after all. The roads were bad and I am a basket case when the roads are so much as shiny. My Mum and Step-Dad came a day later. I did not bottle sangria. We did not soak in the hotsprings.

I thought I had everything planned out... dates and times, when I would shop... but, as they say about the best laid plans...

We spent Christmas with my Sister, her husband and inlaws. It was lovely.

The boys played wii for several hours (what a treat for them), very quietly. We visited, ate, opened gifts, ate some more and had a calm, relaxed, beautiful time.

It made me realise that sometimes the best plans are to have none at all.

Further, I did not go crazy, as I always have, making lists of cleaning and organizing... Alan was shocked that I didn't bark orders, or once get on my hands and knees to scrub floors.

I start this new year with a deep desire to focus on that which is most important to me... my boys, Alan, my home. I have set my business aside for now, focussing on healing from the accident and being home with those I love.

I feel deeply peaceful about it.

I am so happy.

Christmas Spirit

2009-12-21T18:15:00.000-08:00

I was feeling a little bah humbug during the last few weeks... looking for something to spark that excitement for the season I always felt as a kid.

So far, while not feeling particularly "sparky" I feel a little more excitement for the days ahead.

Here's what's helped me...

Baking
Cookie Exchange
Shopping (this is a double-edged sword, though)
Gift-Wrapping
Finding my Sister the perfect gift...;)
Singing Sarah McLaughlin's "Wintersong" album in the car at the top of my lungs.
Putting up our new artificial tree (XOOX Grandpa S.) and dousing it with Pine essential oil
The SNOW!

What do you do to feel the "Spirit of the Season"?

2009-12-05T17:25:00.000-08:00

On Thursday I had an acupuncturist appointment.

I forgot my cell phone and called Alan from P's school to remind him I was coming to pick him up at 3:45 (my appointment was at 4) so he could watch the boys. He said he'd be waiting.

I arrived at 3:40 and waited until 3:50 and then had to leave so I could be there on time. I was mad, but calm.

I called him when I arrived at the office and he said "Why didn't you call me?". He'd forgotten I didn't have my phone and even though I called 30 minutes before I had to pick him up, he is so used to being reminded by phone about things that it doesn't occur to him to set a timer, etc, to ensure promptness.

He arrived, by bus, halfway through my appointment (let me tell you, entertaining 2 boys in a small room while mostly naked, laying down and being stabbed with needles isn't as fun as it sounds) and took the boys home.

Alan is a wonderful man, so this post is not a complaint about him, but more about the effects of relying on contant contactability and how it changes how we organise our time and relate to others.

I am torn. I would really like to have a PDA to make my schedule easier to access (and because I am still having short-term memory problems from the accident) and the best ones out there are cell-phone based (iphone/Blackberry), but I do not want to make this situation worse.

This whole topic reminds me of a recent shopping trip wherein Liam asked me for a toy and I said no. I told him I did not have any cash to buy the toy for him (it has been my standby excuse) and his reply was "Well, then just use your debit r credit card!".

At the time it seemed cute and witty of him to think of this solution, but I found myself laying in bed later, wide awake, mulling it over.

When did my kids notice that you could just swipe a card and pay for whatever you wanted?

How am I going to teach them about money and wise spending and limits?

How will I explain about when convenience is appropriate and when it isn't?

I guess my point is, technology is good... great even, but how will it effect how our children make choices?

Any opinions??

Free Range Mommies... How Cell Phone Holdouts Are Right: Buy a Phone, Become a Baby by Lenore Skenazy

2009-11-26T08:28:00.000-08:00

I love this article... it is so true.

Cell Phone Holdouts Are Right: Buy a Phone, Become a Baby by Lenore Skenazy on Creators.com - A Syndicate Of Talent

Here come the holidays....

2009-11-25T14:44:00.001-08:00

I'd like to preface this post by saying that I have edited it 5 times for spacing, etc and there is something wrong with blogger.

I am letting it go because it shouldn't mean so much to me to have perfect spacing... so here it is, my spacing-impaired blog post... ENJOY!

Soooo.... I am sitting here, having just whipped up a batch of koolaid playdough with Parker, watching him roll and cookie-cutter away, wondering if I should be thinking about Christmas.

I've purchased very few of my gifts so far and we just recently started with the holiday decorating...I usually bake a few things... biscotti, gingerbread, a few kinds of cookies... I have not started yet and I wonder this:

What do YOU do to prepare for and then celebrate the holidays?

We usually go to zoolights, parties and spend Christmas with family and friends...we have Chinese food on Christmas Eve and Eggs Benedict and turkey on Christmas Day. We listen to Stuart McLean and watch movies, open presents and visit. This year we will be spending part of the holidays in Radium, BC at a lovely Chalet!

The tree goes up December 1st and it will be our first year with an artificial tree! I've always held out and insisted on a real tree, but our last few years of trees haven't made it a week without dropping copious amounts of needles on my floor.

I have a small bottle of Alberta Lodgepole pine essential oil distilled by some nice gardeners here in Calgary. I intend to dab it here and there and IMAGINE I am celebrating Christmas at my grandparent's place on highway 16, 5 minutes from the Jasper Park gates.

I remember getting dressed up warm and anually setting out with my Grandfather, little sister and cousins to cut down a Christmas tree. There were SO many perfect Christmas trees on my grandparents land... 20 acres of lodgepole pines and spruce trees. Every year I pointed out a dozen, beautiful trees (often over 10 feet high) and every year we came home with the same tree... 7 feet tall, beautifully green and bushy on three sides and barren on the 4th.

My Grandfather would put the barren side of the tree in the corner and nobody would say another word about it.

I often wondered why he did that... cut down a tree that wasn't perfect...

I used to think it was because he didn't want scruffy, half-barren trees in his forest, but, lately I've come to believe that he wouldn't have cut any tree down if we hadn't been pestering him. He worked almost every day of his adult life in that forest and he loved the trees, the animals and the wildflowers. I think it brought him a lot of peace.

So, this year, Grandpa, I didn't cut down a tree... and every time I look at my artificial tree, I am going to think of you.

Homeschooling ramblings...

2009-11-16T20:04:00.000-08:00

So, I have had quite a few people ask me how homeschooling is going.

Parker opted for the local homeschooling "Blended Program". This means that every Thursday and every second Tuesday and half Friday he attends a school with other homeschoolers. The days are shorter - 10 amd-3pm and it is based on Thematic teaching, but it is fun for him and he likes it so far... his favourite subject is "Recess" or "Dodgeball", but what first-grader's isn't?

At home we do some reading and some basic math, use the abacus, watch an educational video or two, model with clay, paint, bake, dance and play. We meet up with other homeschooling friends, go to the zoo, science center, pool.

One thing about homeschooling that I love is that we get up about 8am. There is no hurrying. There is no rushing through breakfast. There is very little stress. If we need a nap in the afternoon, we put on a quiet video and cuddle on my bed.

Liam is as happy as a clam having time alone with Mama. We have been swimming, shopping, lunching and playing... it is good times and he seems to be out-growing the "f'ing fours"... thank goodness.

So, so far, homeschooling is good... very good!

Chinook headaches

2009-10-29T16:39:00.000-07:00

Do you get these?

We have so many chinooks in Calgary that I find myself with a headache every so often and hear many many other women say the same thing... so for those of you who have them, I discovered something that helps!

I bought an air purifier/ionizer.

Apparently chinook winds fill the air with positively-charged ions... sensitive people feel this and develop a headache.

An ionizer takes positively charged ions and changes them to negative. Most also take care of dust, allergens, bacteria and viruses.

Right now costco happens to have a set of three ionizing air-purifiers on of $199... I have mine running and feel really well!

Let me know if you try it and how it works for you!!

Easy Carrot Muffins

2009-10-28T14:54:00.000-07:00

So, I have been experimenting with some easy baking, with very good results and wanted to share with you!

First, muffins. My boys would eat 5 granola bars a day and I feel very guilty for all the non-recyclable melamine packaging, so I decided to make bran muffins instead.

Tropical Carrot Muffins

Buy any bran or honey bran mix you like.

In a blender add:
1- 2 cup can of pineapple chunks
Put the lid on and blend until pureed.
Then add washed, chunked carrot (I typicall wash and cut a carrot into 2" chunks) one piece at a time blending on low until completely combined. I typically use 3 large carrots or more. Add 2 eggs, blend. If mixture becomes to dry you can add a small amount of water, 1/4 cup at a time.

Combine the mix in a large bowl with the blended ingredients. Mix well. If mixture is too dry, add 1/4 c of water until appropriate consistency is reached.

Spray and fill muffin tins, bake 18-20 minutes at 400 degrees.

The same idea can be used with all kinds of fruits and veggies. I also just do carrot,pineapple with raisins.

You could also try using 1/2 c cocoa and 2-3c grated zuchini, or mashed banana and chocolate chips, or applesauce and raisins with ginger and cinnamon.

The combinations are endless and in 30 minutes you can mix and bake 2 dozen muffins!

Let me know if you have any favourite recipes to share or find a mix that you like (I am trying to find a good wheat-free mix).

Keep it to yourself!

2009-10-20T09:59:00.000-07:00

So, the Joneses have colds... all of us.

Liam spent the whole night, sharing my pillow, facing me, coughing in my face. It was lovely.

I am a miserable, miserable person when I have a cold. I don't sleep and I don't believe in sharing my germs, so I stay home, which in and of itself is misery-making for me.

Which brings me to the whole point of my post - Do you go to work and socialise when you are sick?

If so, WHY!? Why do you do this? I am mad at you. The world will go on without you if you choose to stay home and get well. WHY!!!!???????

If not, Thank you very much for keeping your germs to yourself... you are a wise and benevolent person.

Please excuse me now, while I go wallow in OTC drug-induced self-pity.

I love Saturday!

2009-10-03T13:24:00.000-07:00

Saturday has to be my most favourite day of the week. It is the first day of the weekend, with another weekend day to look forward to and Alan is home. It is a slow/busy day of rest, cooking, shopping, projects, reading and cleaning.

Alan is building me a lovely hall shelf for just outside the bathroom. There is an area at the end of the hall thatis perfect for storage, 8 inches deep by 7+ feet tall by 3+ feet wide. We purchased lumber and Alan spent the morning prepping the area, I bought paint and things are moving along nicely.

Alan is off at his lip-reading class. Yes, there is such a thing. Alan is hard of hearing. Actually, completely deaf in one ear and hard of hearing in the other. He wants to be able to function as effectively in the workplace as possible, IF his hearing deteriorates any more than it has, so he is taking this class. He can already lip read reasonably well (don't all husbands?) and we sign a lot at home, and he has hearing aids. I, personally choose to believe that his hearing will miraculously come back.

The boys are playing wii. They earned the games by cleaning their room, which looks lovely... other than the occasional yell by Liam when he doesn't win (he has yet to master good sportsmanship), all is quiet on the boy front.

I have decided to add a few more animals to the boy's pet collection. I think it will be good for them to have pets to care for and study. We will be adding a lovely black guinea pig to our family early next week, and possibly a lion-head rabbit. Alan thinks I am crazy, but having pets to care for teaches kids to care for someone other than themselves, responsibility, empathy and is supposed to be calming... all good things in my book.

Will soon post pictures!

Green, green all around....

2009-10-01T16:40:00.000-07:00

So, we bought a new car. It is a big sturdy hatchback and, while I never in a million years envisioned myself driving one, I like it, a lot.

We named her Maggie... here she is... and yes, she is a PT Cruiser... apparently you don't have to be retired to drive one...:D

We drove all the way to Jasper, via Banff, on the weekend and she averaged 8.9l/100km!

Not too shabby!

The other green thing, that is new in our house is my hair...turquoise and brown... it was a hit at the wedding...

My Wabi Sabi life....

2009-09-17T20:48:00.000-07:00

Have you ever heard the term Wabi Sabi? No? Until yesterday, neither had I.

I was at the library (since I've decided that owning hundreds of books is overrated when I can pay $12 a year to read as many as I want), browsing and came across the "religion" section. I looked and saw an unnassuming paperbag brown book called 'Wabi Sabi Simple' By Richard R. Powell.

The "simple" part caught my attention, because I am on a simplifying quest, and I picked it up.

It is amazing.

I was never able to explain to others why we choose to live such a pared-down life. I suspect some of my friends think I have low self-esteem because I don't WANT so much of the material as other people. I was never able to explain without coming across as judgemental or extrordinarily odd.

Wabi Sabi is a Japanese lifestyle of minimalism, beauty, simplicity, function, joy, purpose, gratitude, authenticity. It is about being the most authentic you possible. It is about focusing on what is really important and not allowing yourself to be distracted by what the modern world tells you is important.

The quote on the front cover of this book states this (and i love this): "Create beauty. Value imperfection. Live deeply.".

I think I have found a new mantra.

Radical parenting

2009-08-19T19:44:00.000-07:00

So... I read a fabulous article written by former Calgary AP Mama, Tabitha Tucker, someone I know, personally and whose quiet activism has inspired me.

A link to the article is here: http://www.synergymag.ca/parenting-a-radical-political-act/

Tabitha, thanks for your honesty and for your example!!

For all you mothers out there who think being a stay at home mom is the easy, lazy way out, or that trusting your kids to someone else to raise them and teach them values is more respectable than the former... I challenge you to read this article.

For those who've read it, what do you think?

Hippie Role Models

2009-08-15T20:09:00.000-07:00

So...(I begin a lot of sentances with So... Don't I?)... my parents were hippies. I was born in the 70's and I remember wearing bell bottoms and my parents smoking pot and spending a lot of time outside, in the wilderness and with family.

In fact, I grew up with a LARGE hippy/Catholic extended family...that, with few exceptions, lived very close.

I remember listening to ABBA, CCR, BTO and a lot of mid-late 70's music... including Pete Seeger.

For those of you who don't know who Pete Seeger was, here is some cool wikinfo: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pete_Seeger

One of my favourite Pete Seeger song is "If I had a Hammer". It illustrates how 'Before his time' Pete Seeger really was... the free-thinker, the activist, the environmentalist... he is truly amazing.

The neatest thing about this peace-loving song is that he wrote it in the 40's... long before most people were talking about peace and love.

"There is no such thing as a wrong note, as long as you're singing!". - Pete Seeger

IF I HAD A HAMMER
words and music by Lee Hays and Pete Seeger

If I had a hammer
I'd hammer in the morning
I'd hammer in the evening
All over this land
I'd hammer out danger
I'd hammer out a warning
I'd hammer out love between my brothers and my sisters
All over this land

If I had a bell
I'd ring it in the morning
I'd ring it in the evening
All over this land
I'd ring out danger
I'd ring out a warning
I'd ring out love between my brothers and my sisters
All over this land

If I had a song
I'd sing it in the morning
I'd sing it in the evening
All over this land
I'd sing out danger
I'd sing out a warning
I'd sing out love between my brothers and my sisters
All over this land

Well I've got a hammer
And I've got a bell
And I've got a song to sing
All over this land
It's the hammer of justice
It's the bell of freedom
It's the song about love between my brothers and my sisters
All over this land
TRO-Ludlow Music, Inc. (BMI)

Accidents, rain and silver (gold) linings...

2009-08-14T00:26:00.000-07:00

Soo...I was involved in a little accident on Monday. Actually, my car was written off and I had a CT scan (n visible brain damage...but it's the invisible stuff we are most concerned about).

I hit my head and suffered through three days of something called a "post-concussive" headache (basically open skull, poke brain with sharp object repeatedly). It was terrible... I took narcotics.

I went and saw Dr. Rob at Gateway, who fixed me up and when I woke this morning, my headache was mostly gone. No more percocet.

I still hurt, but it is a reminder of how incredibly lucky I am to have walked away with only a concussion and whiplash (medical disclaimer: that we know of). The person who rear-ended me at high speeds actually flipped his own vehicle and was transported to the hospital on a spineboard after being extricated by EMS.

Here is the back of my car.

Liam's carseat could not be extricated... thankfully both boys were safe, at home, with their dad.

The silver lining in all this is that we will get a new car...mine is totalled! WooHoo!

I am hoping to purchase a lovely crossover vehicle frm some friends who are offering it to us for a VERY reasonable price... please cross your fingers for us that this will work out.

On another topic...RAIN!?

While it is great for my garden, it feels like fall... I feel like I should be making soup right now.

Lovely evening... longing.

2009-08-09T20:20:00.000-07:00

We went for a long bike ride this evening. It was so nice.

We saw a young buck deer with velvety antlers, a jackrabbit and, of course, a number of dogs... all of whom strained at their leashes to come play with our boys!

I haven't had a proper helmet for years. I have a ginormous head and have a hard time finding a helmet to fit. The other day, in Winners no less, Alan found me a helmet that fit perfectly!

Tonight after dinner Parker annunced that we were going for a ride... all of us!

Liam rode the trail-a-bike, happily, for the first time. He has always preferred the baby seat on Alan's bike, but he is growing up so much and making so many gains, I was hardly surprised when he opted for the bigger, more exciting option!

Parker rode his new bike, of course. He is a pretty confident rider and I was proud to see him zooming along, aware of his surroundings and following instructions.

I trailed behind them a little, watching all my men happily.

The wind was cool and gentle and refreshing and the sun slowly set in the West. I saw the sky glow a beautiful apricot colour behind tall pine trees.

One thing I truly love about living in Wildwood/Spruce Cliff is the quiet, small-town feeling. The houses are older and the trees are mature and stately.

When the wind blows you can almost imagine yourself in a forest... so quiet.

It is times like these that I long for home... The solitude. The silence. Acres of untrodden snow. Wild berries and windy paths.

I am so blessed to have been raised in such a beautiful place... but always, I long to be there.

Some nights I lay in bed looking at the silhouette of the tall tamarack on the drapes in my bedroom... when I close my eyes, I am 8 years old again, walking, unafraid, in a field of wildflowers.

I am free...

Voluntary Simplicity

2009-08-08T20:46:00.000-07:00

So... we live pretty simply.

I know that if Alan accepted a job in mainstream O&G and worked a LOT more hours, we could have a bigger house. We could have a fancier car. We could go on cruises, have a larger TV and more mad money... but the thing is, we don't want to.

We want him to come home every night by six pm.

We want to have evenings to spend together.

I want to be home with my kids every day and to be the person who gets to see them grow and develop.

I want to have time to help people around me when they need it, rather than being so over-scheduled that I am physically or emotionally unable.

I know many wealthy people. Very few of them are as happy as we are in our tiny home with our sub-compact car and our vacations with family or in the mountains.

I see so many people buying, buying, buying...it almost seems like an attempt to feel happy and successful... but they don't seem to realise that happiness and success are not available for purchase.

Happiness and success are grown and nurtured in one's own home.

I spent this afternoon baking brownies with Parker. He loves to cook. Then we layed in the hammock and read some from the Spiderwick Chronicles.

We ate brownies rocked and laughed and I realised that no car or house or trip or "stuff" could make me feel as content and happy and successful as spending an hour rocking in a $20 hammock with my 6 year old.

To learn more about the Voluntary Simplicity movement, visit the link below:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simple_living

Wow

2009-08-05T16:58:00.000-07:00

So...the past three weeks has been absolutely NUTS!?

My Dad and Step-mom came to visit. I was shocked. I am so conditioned to expect him to bail out at the last minute or try and control or change things that I had written off him ever following through with this... but, they did come and it was a nice visit.

While they were here, water started leaking trough our kitchen ceiling. It did not stop. It happened at odd times, like at night when nobody'd showered or bathed since morning. My Step-mom insisted we speak with someone to have it fixed. See, the problem is that this has happened SO many times since we've lived here and they've only employed stop-gap measures which never worked in the long run.

So, we had someone come in, and I became the squeaky wheel.

So, after living in a hotel and with kind friends for over a week, we have an entirely new bathroom (okay, we DID pay for the new dual-flush toilet and vanity out of pocket), but it is lovely and new and SO nice!

We also seem to have fixed the leak, so no water coming through the ceiling any more... new ceiling... no mold.

Before we could move back in my Mum called and let us know she was coming for the weekend. I was so exhausted from driving P back and forth from where we were staying and camp and drinving to every home-improvement store buying fixtures, paint and caring for Liam.

Mum was due Saturday morning and we, thankfully, had a toilet by Friday afternoon. I was feeling pretty exasperated by Friday night, had a sore throat... but friend was having a jewelry party and I really wanted to support her, s I went and had a nice time.

I was in my own bed by 11pm and started having chills by 11:30. Chills turned to shaking, fever and general horribleness...at 3:30am I woke Alan up and I had a terribly high fever and he says I was incoherantly babbling about planetary alignment.

So, I spent most of the weekend sick... my Mum came anyway (I hope you are still heathy, Mum...:( ) and popped pills every 4-6 hours.

Last night I looked up "cold" in my Louise Hay book and it says it's caused from too much going on around you, etc, etc...I had to laugh... I think I may qualify.

Promises, part two

2009-07-23T12:46:00.000-07:00

So, my Dad and Step-Mom came to visit?!

I am honestly surprised. After last summer, I thought we might be in for another blow up... but he came out without a fight and stayed three nights, leaving this morning.

We had a nice time and I think he enjoyed spending time with the boys... they enjoyed spending time with him.

He also brought a big box of my school work and photos from when I was younger. I have been wanting these things so much... I cried when I looked at some of it.

It turned out to be a nice visit.

The other thing that is going on is that we have a leak somewhere and it is leaking through the kitchen ceiling. It happens at odd times. the cut holes in the ceiling this morning and pulled down a bunch of drywall and there was mold growing on it. Then they clean up (poorly) tell me they fixed the leak and leave. I call the onsite manager and he comes over and turns on the water...it still leaks.

I start to cry.

The last time they opened the ceiling, Parker get very sick and was diagnosed with Kawasaki Disease. They don't what causes Kawasaki Disease but believe it is caused by a microbe. I am petrified of him becoming sick again...:(

Busy few weeks.

2009-07-15T16:30:00.000-07:00

So, it has been awhile since I posted. You know what summer is like... a blur of weekend trips, BBQ's and family visits.

Alan had 11 days off and we purged our little home, reorganised and streamlined the organisation...it is much better. We had a little impromptu visit with my Mum and Doug up at their home on Pigeon Lake, followed by a full day at the new (ish) Castaway Bay Kid's water park area at West Edmonton Mall Waterpark. It was LOVELY! It is perfect for kids aged 3+. The boys, always attended, did not even need to wear lifejackets! Liam ran up to the top and came down the waterslides all on his own and Parker went down most of the adult waterslides...with a few exceptions.

Saturday we drove out to Drumheller and spend several hours at the Dinosaur museum...the boys LOVED everythng...it is really an interesting educational experience. We spent most of the evening hanging out with some c-moms friends at their annual campout. We did not stay the night, but we did enjoy the visit and introduced some nice people from Austraila and New Zealand to the wonders of smores, Jones style.

Yesterday saw us prepping the soil and laying sod in 1/2 of our yard. It is a 10x10 foot patch of grass that we don't use much because the grass had been poorly maintained for decades. Now it is lush and green, perfect for bare feet and picnics!

The opposite side of our lawn is approximately 13x11 feet and will be done in the next few weeks when the grass is ready to be enjoyed. The entire yard will only cost us $100 worth of sod and fertilizer (with a whole lot of elbow grease).

Alan is back to work today and the boys and I spent the day with friends at Arbour Lake. We dug in the sand, enjoyed some sun and paddled around the lake in a paddle boat.

It has been a busy but lovely summer so far!

Feeling groovy...

2009-07-02T16:55:00.000-07:00

So, I am feeling better.

We ran around the science centre for a few hours, watched a presentation on Galileo and had a slurpie.

Then we went to Edworthy park for a couple of hours and the boys met some new friends and played under the big spruce trees while I read a book.

When we left, after 4pm, they were FILTHY, but happy and I was much more relaxed.

We ended the day with a trip to Dairy Queen where Parker ate an entire banana-split, getting strawberries all over the front of his shirt.

Normally, this would send me over the edge, but I just turned his shirt around backwards and pretended it never happened...:D

I tossed them in the shower and they rinsed away the dirt, ice cream, pine needles and other lovely things they had stuck in their hair.

We are home, clean and tired.

It was a good day!

Promises, Promises...

2009-07-02T10:01:00.000-07:00

My Dad is not a "my word is my bond" kind of guy.

My entire life he has made me promises... from promising to teach me to drive (he didn't, he said it was because I was a girl), to promising to show up for parent teacher interviews(he didn't... something at work came up and my teacher had to drive me home) to promising to come visit us out here in Calgary(a multitude of things have come up to prevent this). When I mention it to him he becomes angry and defensive and demanding.

For the past two summers he has been promising to come out and spend time with us out here. Inevitably "plans change" and he calls asking us to come out there instead. We suggest meeting in the middle (it is a 9 hour drive) and he makes a million excuses as to why that will not work for him. Last year they drove all over the West Coast in a motorhome and drove home through Red Deer and didn't bother to stop and see us.

I feel like I am digging in my heels, but I am so tired of his false promises and of being the person who is the peace-maker and tries to make everyone happy. I sent him a message telling him that we already had plans for next week and, if all else fails and he doesn't manage to visit us here this summer, like he has been promising, we will see him in September at my cousin's wedding.

I am feeling so angry right now...I think I need to go wreck my journal.

Food, health, weight....blah, blah, blah.

2009-06-30T16:58:00.000-07:00

So, it is now week 5 of my concerted effort to be healthier and to let go of the junk in my trunk.

So far I am down 13 lbs!

I am actually quite surprised as I am stuffing my face with summer fruit every chance I get. Apparently what they say about not eating too much fruit because of the sugar doesn't apply here... and thank goodness, because I LOVE CHERRIES! I LOVE WATERMELON! I LOVE STRAWBERRIES!...

Ok, honestly, I just love food.

So, the jist of what I am doing is to eat more, more often, with more joy.

I am keeping track (because I am a list-maker) and looking back, there have been days where I eat more 100 calorie snack bags than I care mention (er...was that a snack or a meal?) and then there was my birthday (weekend)...but most days are good.

A few things I've done that seem to be helping;

I cut out the artificial sweetners. We no longer use any of them in our home...no, not even splenda. What I am using is a natural sweetner called Stevia and it is amazing! No headaches or terrible fatigue when I am using this over artificially-sweeteed beverages.

I am also drinking more water. Well, water with lime juice, a few frozen strawberries popped in and some stevia. The best, most refreshing calorie-free beverage ever! Koolaid without the sugar, dye, artificial flovour and preservatives.

Greens+. My Acupunturist turned me on to this stuff and it's amazing! I mix it into a smoothie in the morning and I have energy all day. It is available all over the place and is worth it's weight in gold. Last month I did greens+ and all-greens, this month I am trying the greens+multi. Will let you know what I think.

I WAS wearing a pedometer to record how many steps I take per day. 10000 steps per day is roughly equivalent to 30 minutes of physical activity. I was ranging between 6 and 16 thousand steps per day, depending on the day (weekends were less because Alan is home to help). I pledge to start wearing it again tomorrow and writing down the results.

Other than that, laying in the hammock, wrecking my journal (pictures to come, Sara), watching "wipeout" because it makes me laugh like a crazy person and trying to keep the boys busy (there should be an exercise catagory for this).

Unschooling, schedules...rAmBlinGs.

2009-06-29T09:42:00.001-07:00

So, if you think homeschooling/unschooling is stupid, prepare yourself.

This post isn't up for criticisim. It is here because we have gone through some changes over the past few months and I want to blog about it....

In May we made the big decision to homeschool. This idea has been in my heart for a long time. I knew it was right for Parker, but I had no idea how to go about it.

My logical self went out and bought curriculum and workbooks, schedulling 15-20 minutes of "school" time after meals each day. Parker balked.

After a month of misery and me seriously questioning my homeschooling chops I posted on a homeschooling group I belong to, for ideas and inspiration.

The replies I got were frank; WHY was I forcing him to learn these things? Was I really so worried about him learning to write at 6? Who cares about counting by twos and fives?

I decided that a period of "de-schooling" was in order... honestly, more for me than for Parker. It was me that needed to let go of my conventional ideas about schooling.

So I stopped. We played, slept in, played some more.

One day P came into the diningroom and asked for a paper and pencil. He sat down and wrote a story about a little girl with sausages for fingers. Some of the words were spelled phonetically, but I understood every word and it was the loveliest of stories... brought tears to my eyes.

I had been pushing something so mundane on him. He was bored.

The more I thought about the schedule of school and the conventionality of it, the more I realised that it is just another way to train a child to conform to a traditional 9-5 work week, often in a job that isn't interesting, or challenging.

While I feel that there is nothing wrong with a 9-5 work week, the boy's Dad works in a conventional (albeit family-friendly) job, I don't want the boys pre-conditioned to that life.

I want them to choose what they want to do, be, the hours they want to work. I know people who are so ingrained with the idea that they have to work long hours to be respected that they cannot take time off at Christmas to spend time with their family.

While it is important for kids to understand convention and conformity, I rather think that 6 is far too young to live these things. How can he become who he IS when there are so many things he wants to understand and I am teaching him that counting by twos is more important?

Since then we've dropped the homeschooling idea. We are unschoolers. It works for us.

We sleep us much as we want, not feeling the need to get up early and rushing around to conform to someone's school schedule.

We eat popcorn and a tiny bit of chocolate in the mornings.

We swing in the hammock and read a book.

We fill our pockets with rocks and feathers.

We squish coins on train tracks and guess which will be flattest.

We water plants and pull weeds.

We wash the floor, pick up toys, bake bread and tidy the livingroom together.

We count all the money in our piggybanks.

We visit the Science Center, Zoo, Museum, grocery store, world - together.

We are happy.

Here is my promise as the loving Mama of my two little people...I will let them BE.

Organisation

2009-06-29T07:21:00.001-07:00

Yesterday saw us reorganising our kitchen/dining-room. We have a TINY, poorly laid out pantry (closet) in the kitchen and never know what is in there.

We purchased a new "pantry" and decided to move all our pantry food items into there. All our pots, pans and small appliances will move into the old pantry and hopefully this will result in a new, streamlined kitchen.

Alan also installed our air conditioner last night. We'd assumed it wouldn't fit into our new windown, but we pulled it out yesterday and got the loveliest of surprises...it fits perfectly!

Since the house did not go through, we have decided to stay here, for the time being, while we search for another, more suitable house. I insisted that we had to make things more comfortable and Alan seemed to have no objections to that.

Now to renovate the library (read: stairwell)...;)

Drama-Makers

2009-06-27T08:59:00.000-07:00

Do you have any of these in your life?

People who make their own lives a constant rollercoaster of emotions; Love, infatuation, Jealousy, Hatred, Stress, Despair...basically, Chaos.

I get that everyone feels these things in their lives sometimes, sometimes brought on by situations completely out of our control...but the kind of person I am talking about actually seems to THRIVE on these emotions... and then tries to pull everyone around them in.

These people deplete me. This year has been a year of letting these people go.

Every once in a while we need to take stock of how we are feeling emotionally and what we are letting ourselves get caught up in... because we have to let it get to us... and decide if it is really worth the stress (sometimes it is).

I gave my head a good shake this morning and "De-Drama-ed" my current reality.

So long Drama-Maker.

Hammock Heaven

2009-06-25T17:24:00.000-07:00

I have wanted a hammock for SO long. I layed down in one somewhere once and it was so great that I haven't stopped thinking about it.

Today is Thursday and the flyers arrived and what do you know...Canadian Tire has a lovely rope hammock on sale for $24.99. I had to have it.

Alan installed it between a corner post of our fence and the lovely Tamarack in our yard... with a few adjustments (to stop my bottom from grazing the grass) and I was in hammock heaven!

Liam and I cuddled under one of Parker's silks and read this month's 'Chirp' magazine (thanks Mom!), then Parker decided he needed some quiet hammock time and we left him alone to relax (mostly alone...I had to take some pictures...:D).

If you have a quiet spot between two trees that you don't know what to do with, I'd highly recommend it.

Looking up

Me, relaxing.

Feigning sleep because I asked him to...:)

Parker, relaxing.

New hobbies!

2009-06-24T14:44:00.000-07:00

I have taken up a new hobby!

I have always been interested in terrariums. Alberta is such a dry place that many types of plants do not thrive here. I also have little time to care for plants, so it was a natural fit.

Below are a few I have made over the past few months for myself and for good friends!

What are YOUR hobbies?? Have you found that they are different than those you had before kids?

New Home excitement!

2009-06-22T16:00:00.000-07:00

So, we put in an offer on a new home!

We need all the positive energy and abundant thoughts you are willing to send our way!

If you have a second, please close your eyes to see us getting our house, feel excited and then send that energy to us!

Thanks!!

I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!

Solstice activities & Father's Day

2009-06-21T06:21:00.000-07:00

Last night, at 11:46 our time we smudged each other in the yard, held hands and sent it out there...the feelings that we will feel in our new home, what we needed and what we want.

It was calm and warm outside, a nice night for wishcasting. I can still faintly smell the wild sage on my skin this morning... like a reminder of what wonderful things are coming.

I am up early this morning. The boys are still asleep and I have just assembled my first "wife-saver" casserole. Of course, due to the fact that Liam is mostly vegetarian and he and I don't handle dairy well, I had to switch it up a bit. I layeed homemade honey whole wheat bread with fresh blueberries, then whipped up an egg, cinnamon, vanilla mixture in the blender and poured it overtop. I finished it up with cinnamon, brown sugar and butter...all things Alan loves.

Which brings me to my next point... Alan.

It has been 10 years of marriage for us this year... some of those years easy and some hard, but all of them have been so GOOD.

He is an amazing Dad, so active with the boys, and a wonderful husband... always giving me the space I need to figure life out.

I know, at times, I am not the easiest person to live with... I am a Gemini and therefor am changeable and constantly looking at new interests. But, when I knit a hat, or stamp a card or make a terrarium, he is my biggest fan... what a guy!

Thanks for being you today, Alan... hope you like the casserole.

Wreck this Journal.

2009-06-19T07:16:00.000-07:00

So, last night was my 35th birthday party.

Me and 10 friends went to a local "shi-shi" French restaurant, with amazing food called the Laurier Lounge. They reserved us an entire room and we sat around, sipped wine or mojitos (admittedly, many, many mojitoes were consumed), ate yummy things like seared scallops and poutine galvaude and escargot and bruschetta.

We laughed quite loudly and I, personally, had a lovely time.

One of my lovely friends bought me my very own "Wreck this Journal".

I had never actually looked inside a wreck this journal, had no idea what it was all about, but as soon as I started to read it, I realised how much I NEEDED this book.

My first act was to poke holes in one of the pages, with a pen. Followed closely by squashing a lime wedge and blueberry between another set of pages. I honestly cannot remember how many pages I completed last night...but it was so CATHARTIC!

I am so careful, in my life, to keep everything neat, tidy, looking perfect and this book gives you permission to mess it up...and to enjoy doing it!!

I arrived home to find P & L still awake at 10pm...they were baking me a cake because today is actually my birthday. So I let it go...and we wrecked a few pages in my journal...it was the first think Liam talked about this morning...how fun it was to wreck the pages...it made me realise that we need more destructive fun.

I am letting go...

The Sisterhood

2009-06-18T08:34:00.000-07:00

Okay, ever hear of "finding your tribe"? I think I have found mine in the Sisterhood of the Purple Bicycle.

I spent quite a lot of time reading and laughing and relating to their recent blogging.

I encourage you, regardless where you are in your journey, to follow the Purple bicycle trail and make yourself some new promises.

Personally, I promise to stop taking myself and life SO seriously.

Be authentic. Be joyful. Just BE.

Life-coaching Part 2...long post.

2009-06-17T17:11:00.000-07:00

So, my coaching session was pretty good, great actually.

Hanna really focused in on what it is that we expect to FEEL in our new home. She wanted to identify three main emotions that we feel a new home will bring us.

I identified a desire for freedom; in that we would like a home that is OURS, that we can do with what we want. Paint, renovate, have a dog, plant trees, bushes, a garden...whatever. For some reason I find light also very freeing...I would like a home with a lot of light.

I also identified peace as one of the emotions. We live in the inner-city. It is loud. It is busy. Our home is very small and we do not have a lot of personal space. I think having a place to go to do our individual things when neccesary would bring a large measure of peace. I would also enjoy being a little closer to nature. The lone Tamarack tree in our yard is GLORIOUS, but I would like hundreds... nature has always been a part of how I relax and let go of stress and I think it is good for kids to grow up with trees and wildlife... I did and it has contributed to who I am.

Love is the third emotion I identified. Because we resident manage, our schedule is unpredictable. Add into that MY job and Alan and I rarely get to spend time together. When we do, we are exhausted and usually folding laundry. Moving from here into our own home will open up 2-3 nights a week for us to be together as a family. I crave more time together as a family. I also deeply desire the space to have extended family and friends in our home. I grew up in a close-knit extended family and miss spending holidays and special occasions together. We try in our home, but 12 people in our tiny living room is challenging.

Hanna also suggested performing a ceremony...sending all of our desires out into the universe...asking for what we want and then living the life we desire, emotions and all, knowing that the house will be there.

We had planned to do something like this to celebrate Summer Solstice on Sunday (Father's Day)... strip the boys down and let them dance naked in the moonlight and BELIEVE that it is coming...now we have a little more direction and and focus...we are going to do it!

My question for you is this: What do YOU desire? What three emotions can you see yourself feeling when you acheive this thing? What are you doing now to achieve it?

More to come...perhaps with pictures!

Coaching

2009-06-15T16:08:00.000-07:00

So, my friend Hanna is a life-coach.

She isn't one of those bossy, opinionated people... I mean, she does have opinions, but she lets people figure out their own way and encourages them.

I made an appointment for a coaching session with her on Wednesday afternoon. The new home thing is constantly on my mind and Hanna is a true believer in manifesting what you want and need in this life. She practices it in her life and I am grateful to glean some of her wisdom and experience.

Hanna also does NLP, or Neurolinguistic Programming. Anyone have experience with this? From what I understand, it is a kind of hypnosis that helps you let go of pre-conceived ideas about yourself, life, just about anything... eventually replacing them with new ideas.

In the meantime, I have a new mantra..."I have my dream home"... Say a little prayer for us that we will be able to move in next month.

2009-06-13T20:37:00.000-07:00

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people

won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give

other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear,

our presence automatically liberates others.”

-Marianne Williamson

The garden

2009-06-09T16:33:00.000-07:00

I am so excited! After all that snow and cold and rain I worried that my sweetpeas were never going to come up, but this morning I spied GREEN poking out of the dirt. We won't be here to enjoy them while they are in bloom this year, but I will drive by and peek.

My ranaculus are sprouting, finally. This is my first year for this plant and I am excited to see all the colours! Here is what it will look like when it blooms:

It is supposed to make a beautiful cut flower and I LOVE to have fresh flowers inside. I am hoping they smell better than my beautiful (but malodourous) Shasta Daisies.

Once I cut and arranged a lovely vase of them for a sick friend. I brought them inside to tie a ribbon around the vase and thought that, perhaps, Alan had forgotten to take out the garbage. I was wrong. Shasta daisies are lovely and grow like a dream, but they smell horrific.

I left them out on the step and had many compliments from visitors

I would like to experiment with some native plants in our new place. I am cosidering Alberta Wild Roses, Wild Sage, crocus' from the Ranch and wild strawberries.

Anyone have experience working with native plants? Any favourites?

Health, Wealth and Wisdom.

2009-06-09T10:02:00.000-07:00

About a month ago I decided to take a chance and purchase the Nutrisystem Weightloss program I'd recently seen advertised at Costco. I was so excited to receive it in the mail and decided to give it an entire month before deciding whether to re-order or not.

After three days, the thought of eating any more of the mushy, tasteless food made me dream of Taco Bell. I took it back for a full refund from Costco.

On May 23rd I started my program. I eat a sensible breakfast... this morning was an apple, sliced, yogurt, a hard boiled egg and tea. I eat a fruit and protein snack about 11, whatever I really FEEL like for lunch with veggies and sometimes an added protein (like cottage cheese, cheese, an egg or yogurt), another protein and fruit (or veggie) snack, then dinner, with dessert and a snack before bed. I am aiming for 1700-1800 calories a day.

So far, in 16 days, I am down 7 lbs.

It is more food than I am used to, and some days I only hit the 1500 calorie mark before I am done.

I realise now that I have been dieting since I was 8 years old, always thinking that food was my enemy and starving myself until I ate, desperately.

I wonder how many overweight women there are out there who were raised with the same, unhealthy attitude about food? Do they realise what happens when you feed your body what it needs? Your body lets go because you feel satisfied, healthy, happy.

Hugs to anyone out there who, like me, has allowed this to control their life. Repeat after me - "Food is my friend and I deserve to eat regular, healthy, delicious meals.".

Be kind to yourself.

Embracing the light

2009-06-02T17:16:00.000-07:00

Not a lot to say about this... I think we all need a reminder of the goodness of our lives sometimes...here is my favourite.

DESIRATA

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore, be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful.

Strive to be happy.

New Home

2009-06-01T09:07:00.000-07:00

So, it has come time to move.

Alan and I were blessed with this job nearly 2 1/2 years ago. We are so grateful for it and for all the opportunities we've seen from it. It made life easier for us and came at a time when I needed to be home with the kids because of Parker's health challenges, but our needs have changed int he last year.

We need more space. We need a safer community. We need neighbourhood kids that the boys can safely play with. We need less traffic, pollution and litter. We need more nature around us. We need to feel safe in our home. We need more time together as a family. We need a home built with healthy materials. We need a community that will open up different opportunities for us.

We want comfort. We want quiet. We want music. We want a dog (or two:)). We want more than one bathroom. We want a home that friends and family can come to relax. We want to move this summer.

I am sending it out there, to the universe, all the things we need and want... I know it will happen for us.

Incidently. We would like to find homes for the things we have but don't need, to make room for what we do need. If you know of someone in need of a couch (fairly new, in good condition), shelves, side tables, dining table, a dresser or two and a number of other things... please let me know.

Top 10 Meme

2009-05-29T11:42:00.000-07:00

Okay, so go to your pictures folder and post your favourite 10 pictures, with a brief description, from the past year. At least one has to be of YOU!

Kris, Jo-Ann, Sara, Jenn, Jennifer...TAG!

Here are mine:

A dog and her boys...Goldie, the boy's 'Grand-dog'

The boys cuddling with my Mum, Grandma C.

Liam, just being Liam

P enjoying a PB & j on his Dad's Homemade Whole Wheat Bread

Parker & I

Harvesting our purple potatoes!

The boys exploring a spring wheat field

Liam enjoying a late snow day!

King-Parker on his 6th Birthday!

Liam's Lime-frog Cupcakes, courtesy of Simply Sweet

Alan & I enjoying some sun and a good book on our 10th anniversary!

Ok...there are 11...but I couldn't leave one out~!

Toothless Wonder

2009-05-28T16:56:00.000-07:00

So, my 6 year old finally lost his front tooth.

We were walking in the grocery store and he said, "Mom, I can turn my tooth sideways!!". Sure enough, it was twisted sideways in his mouth. 15 minutes later it was out and his little face has changed forever...*sniff*.

I remember when he got his first bottom tooth, feeling a little sad that his little smile would never be the same.

I don't think I will ever get used to how amazingly quickly he changes and grows... I love him...:)

Bath or shower?

2009-05-27T21:38:00.000-07:00

Are you a bath person or a shower person?

I predict that many people will answer that BEFORE kids they were bath people and AFTER having kids they became shower people... at least that is what happened to me.

It seems like one day I lounged for hours in the tub with a good book, was exfoliated and shaved and smelled great and the next day I hadn't showered in three days, could braid my leg hair and smelled like sour milk.

With the boys now somewhat independant I have decided to revert back to my pre-shower days... I am going to enjoy a nice soak. Bubbles. Smooth, hair-free legs and BOOKS...oh, yes... there will be books.

I think I am going to start...tonight!

Dream Boards

2009-05-26T11:04:00.000-07:00

So, anyone ever done one?

I am going away this weekend (I know, again) for a retreat with a group of good friends. I am thinking of taking a portion of one of the days to complete a dreamboard. I have invited my friends to join me as well.

I know everyone has dreams... everyone is striving to find balance in their lives and to attract things, comfort, friendship, health and most important, happiness.

It can be easy to get side-tracked by life's everyday challenges and change your focus from things you truly want from your life, to settling for what your current situation is... and feeling stuck is frustrating.

I know this. I know this with all my heart, but I have been allowing things to get in the way and it is time to change direction and start to focus on things that are truly meaningful.

Summer

2009-05-25T15:50:00.000-07:00

So...Have you had your vitamin D checked before?

I just did and apparently, I have none. This is a problem, but one that is relatively easy to fix.

I am currently taking 4000iu per day of D3...and i have not had chest pain since I started.

I am feeling so relieved. Vitamin D deficiency causes all kinds of things...hypertension, muscle pain (including chest pain), headaches, depression....the list goes on.

We have just come out of one of the longest, darkest winters in years (at least 10, maybe more) and I am so happy to feel the sun on my skin again.

We sat at Edworthy Park the other day and there were children playing and peole laughing and visiting and it was warm and the breezy...it was beautiful.

Oh Summer...how I've missed you.

Home

2009-05-18T09:15:00.000-07:00

So, our 3 day escape was wonderul!

I'd forgotten what it was like not to have to do something because someone else wanted you to.

Alan and I arrived at Blackstone around dinner time on Thursday... we made Chai lattes with the lovely Tassimo *S* gave us, ordered Panago and popped in a movie. We were so tired, we didn't want to go anywhere or do anything.

Saturday we both enjoyed an hour massage, followed by 30 minutes of Crainal Sacral Therapy and a pedicure. I fell asleep during the cranial sacral treatment and actually woke myself up, snoring...:) The therapist was very nice and told me what I tell anyone who snores during a treatment "No worries, we take it as a compliment!".

The pedicurist was a lovely, 40-something, German Lady. We chatted about the differences between Germany and Canada... she preferred Munich because Calgary was such a "small" city...:)

We then drove to Banff and spent the afternoon shopping, ate at Barpa Bills (Banff's best Burger) and enjoyed the release of "Angel's and Demons"... which not only turned out surprisingly like the book, but painted the Catholic Church in a reasonably positve light, after all was said and done. Having grown up Catholic, it always bugs me when they try and make Catholics out to be crazy. Even though there was a crazy priest in the movie, the basic chuch was quite interesting.

Saturday we ate breakfast at Starbucks (try their oatmeal...so yummy!) and then shopped in Canmore for a few hours before spending the rest of the day laying on the deck chairs at our hotel, reading and relaxing. It was SO warm, we were in our bathingsuits!

My normally pale, freckled skin actually has a bit of colour!

There were many families staying at our hotel and they all seemed to enjoy the pool! We polled half a dozen kids who looked around our boy's age and have decided that the boys would enjoy coming with us on a weekend getaway sometime this summer.

Saturday night we read/watched movies/ate/slept and just basically relaxed.

Sunday morning we packed up and arrived home to get the house ready for the boy's return.

While we were away, Parker lost tooth number 3! Liam spent his entire sleeping hours wrapped around my friend's neck and my dear friend had a reminder of how "on" you have to be with a 4 and 6 year old. She was great and the boys were well cared-for.

I feel refreshed and happy and look forward to the week!

Beautiful Day!

2009-05-13T16:45:00.000-07:00

WHAT a beautiful day!

I have no idea if I am feeling so well because I am getting better or if it's because Alan and I are going away for a few days for our 10th anniversary...ALONE!

We have never gone away together since having kids. Not even overnight. So this is a really big deal for us... even though we are just going here.

I have a dear friend who is amazing with kids and she has agreed to take the boys for a few days.

I told the boys yesterday, so it wasn't a big surprise... Liam cried on his bed for nearly 30 minutes...:(... I decided that I had to figure out some things about staying at Debbie's he would find exciting.

Our conversation went a little like this:

ME: "Liam, did you know Debbie has two teenage daughters? They know how to read and will read you stories!!!!!"

LIAM: "But I want YOUUUUUUU!"

ME: "Debbie has Two DOGS!!! I bet you could help take them for a walk!"

LIAM: "But I WANT to stay with YOUUUUUU!!!"

ME: "Debbie has a HOT TUB!!!!"

LIAM: "*sniff* Really? But you will be gone too long!?"

ME: "Did you know Debbie's husband is a Police Officer?"

LIAM (no longer crying): "REALLY????!!!! Does he have a GUN?".

I think he is over it.

Manifesting, the secret & the universe...

2009-05-07T06:55:00.000-07:00

I believe in the Secret, or manifestive thinking or whatever you want to call it... it totally works in my life.

I know a lot of religious people that think the Secret is somehow blasphemous or satanic or something not altogether good... but I think that kind of thinking is kind of short-sighted.

Some people believe in a Christian God, others call him Buddah or Allah, some people believe in the Goddess, or the Universe... there is an endless list of possibilities when it comes to faith and spirituality. The bottom line with all of these choices, I believe, is their capacity to work for good in someone's life.

I consider myself a spiritual person. I feel spiritual power working in my life. I don't know whether to call myself a Christian... maybe in a past life.

Honestly, though, when I look at my life, where I have been and where I am now...I am happier.

I am more confident with my relationship with God or the universe now that I have ceased to try and explain and understand the nature of that power. I just believe it is there, I accept it and it works strongly in my life... more strongly than ever.

Recently I watched and felt this power work in a friend's life. It was good. It was strong. It was unmistakable. She asked for help and within 48 hours, against pretty good odds, it happened for her.

When I closed my eyes and thought about her and focused on her needs, I felt an overwhelming power... the only other time I have felt this power was while sending positive thoughts and energy to a critically ill child. I told her what I felt and that I KNEW she would receive what she wanted... it was so clear. The next day, she did.

There must have been many people sending her energy.

I am working up to manifesting something huge very soon. It is mine. I deserve it. It is neccesary.

I think I may need to take a page from Sara and do a 'Wishcasting Wednesday'.

What do you think about the Secret? Manifestive thinking? Positive energy?

2009-05-06T07:50:00.000-07:00

So I spent 90 minutes yesterday with an acupunctrist.

I have never really had acupuncture before, so I was unsure of what to expect, but, really, it wasn't bad...

So she placed a total of 9 needles, all tipped with silver and gold, 5 in my ears, one in my wrist, one in my cleavage one on my left ankle and one on my right foot!

I am drinking some herbals twice a day and following her advice to destress and rest.

The picture is of my ear, with the tiny gold seed that she placed there for me to push several times a day until next weeks appointment.

See if you can find it.

De-stressing

2009-05-04T10:31:00.001-07:00

So, I have been dealing with too much stress lately.

Parker's school situation, my niece and recently the lies and betrayal of someone I considered a good friend...

I am not certain that this stress hasn't triggered the health challenges that I am experiencing right now...it all seems to have popped up too close together.

I have regular chiropractic care and recently massage, but my question is this: How do you deal with stress? What do you do, for better or for worse that helps you reduce the stress in your life?

Bloodwork and echoes and hearts...oh my!

2009-05-02T11:16:00.000-07:00

So, I have been feeling kind of crappy for awhile.

I've been tired and my hair is falling out (this happened after the boys were born) and I have been having some strange indigestion and shortness of breath so off I went almost 2 weeks ago to my doctor.

I figured it was my thyroid...or that the type 2 diabetes everyone has been talking about had finally caught up to me...but after my initial bloodwork it turns out that all those things were fine.

What was off were my CBC (complete blood count) and Sed-rate. My doctor became quite tight-lipped and at first told me it just meant something was wonky...then he said it indicated an inflammatory process in my body...then, after some intense questioning on my part he admitted that it could likely be an auto-immune disease and wrote out a new blood work requisition and asked me to rebook for three weeks later.

He did not, however, listen to my heart and lungs or take my blood pressure.

My indigestion kept getting worse and worse and nothing I took helped at all...and, despite my better judgement, I looked up Auto-immune diseases and spoke to a friend who is a medical professional.

Everything seems to point to Lupus... and with lupus, there is often cardiac involvement...and then it dawned on my that the indigestion I was feeling was rather high up in my chest (sub-sternal).

The end result was that I spent the night at the Rockyview hospital (they admitted me because I was having chest pain, difficulty breathing and my normally low Blood Pressure was 146/110.

Apparently I have pericarditis. I am supposed to be having an echocardiogram in the next two days and possibly a pericardiocentesis (they stick a long needle into the sac surrounding your heart to take a sample fo the fluid there to see if it is caused by a virus, bacteria or other cause).

I just don't understand why my doc, whom our entire family has seen for over 5 years, didn't take a few minutes to listen to my heart and lungs, or to ask me any other questions?

So, my question is this; are you happy with your family doctor?

Potty training - Part Three

2009-04-29T23:40:00.000-07:00

Ok...so what is up with Liam?? He has been potty-trained, with very few problems, since last fall.

The last week he has peed his pants 4 times and done the messy stuff once!?

How does a 4 year old just FORGET how to use the toilet??

Do I need to start reminding his and taking him myself?

Has this happened to you before?

What did you do?

Sunshine

2009-04-18T12:12:00.000-07:00

I am SO enjoying the beautiful sunshine streaming through my window today. It finally feels like spring and I am SO ready for this!

I've decided to transplant my beets and carrots into two large terracotta pots. The greens will look pretty for the next two or three months and when they are big enough...we can start pulling them out!

We have been spring cleaning, de-junking and organizing in anticipation of a new fmily member!

Yes, we are anxiously awaiting news of a 7 year old girl who will hopefully be joining our family in the next few months.

Please say a little prayer for us that everything will fall into place and she will be where she needs to be and have a stable, happy life.

Headaches

2009-04-04T09:55:00.000-07:00

Anyone have headaches?? Migraines?

I used to get them a lot before the boys. Apparently pregnancy and lactation does something to your hormones that often reduces the number of headached you experience. This was true for me and I don't believe I had one bad headache for the 5 years I was either pregnant or breastfeeding.

It has been 18 months since Liam weaned and in the past year my migraines have crept back in.

I found an amazing chiropractor - Dr. Rob www.chirozone.ca that keeps my back and neck in good shape. I have not had a migraine since October! Even during the chinooks, etc, the worst I had was a mild headache.

This morning, however, I woke with a throbbing behind my left eye. I have taken medication, to no avail... the throbbing continues. The worst things is that Dr. Rob is closed until Monday morning (must find his personal address). I think I would rather be perpetually pregnant and nursing than feel like this.

Any secret migraine cures out there?? Do you have migraines?

Kim and Aggie

2009-04-01T09:15:00.000-07:00

Have you ever watched this pair? They are the famed British wonder duo that tackle what seems to be the houses of bachelors and hoarders in the UK in the attempt to teach these people to clean. Kim sports an updo and has no qualms about getting on her hands and knees to smell any stain and Aggie swabs every surface of a home for bacteria and lectures on the dangers.

The other night, sick Lisa and sick Alan layed on the couch and watched "How Clean is YOUR House"...BIG mistake.

Yesterday saw us vacuuming up a storm in our antihistamine-induced, nearly unconcious states. Alan had the bright idea to vacuum our mattress to see what comes out. We have a clear canister vacuum, you see, and my DEAR quirky husband LOVES to completely empty it and give things a good vacuuming...just to see how much he can vacuum up.

Please don't do this to yourselves...it is nightmare-inducing. We are now vacuuming our bed monthly...that's all I am saying about it...Eeeew.

So with our room vacuumed, dusted, sprayed with Sol-u-Guard and dusted some more, I have to say that is really IS a nicer place to sleep...even if we weren't living under 18 years of filth, dust and cobwebs.

On second hand...maybe you SHOULD watch the show with your husband... it made Alan realise how good a housekeeper I really am...;)

Kim & Aggie... eat your hearts out!

Hope

2009-03-30T06:56:00.000-07:00

So, we are sick over here...Liam was up all night coughing Saturday night...I woke Sunday with the beginnings of a cold and Alan and P are sniffling...we are out of coryzalia and I am a little cranky...the only thing keeping me going this morning is looking outside at the beautiful sunrise!

Recently my thoughts have turned to a choice we all have. To look at life positively and with hope, or to choose not to see all he good things in life and fall into despair. I know despair is a strong word...it was the best description of the lack of hope that I could find.

I chatted with someone yesterday who seems to have lost all hope for her life. No matter how many positive things I said or how often I reminded her of her blessings, she turned it around and made it a negative thing. I left the conversation feeling so uneasy and unhappy for her. It was clear that she was missing a fundamental part of her psyche... it unnerved me.

My life has not always been easy. I have struggled and lived through things I hope to never experience again... but I have never been devoid of hope.

I try and find joy in the small things in life; my children and their funny senses of humour, the kindness of my husband, laughter with good friends, sprouting seeds, the sun shining and reminding me that today is a new day, with a fresh start.

What keeps you going? What brings you joy??

What are you grateful for today?

More gardening

2009-03-22T22:27:00.000-07:00

So, I know there is 25 cm of snow outside. I tried to will it away today, but it hasn't worked... so far! I am in a full 'start your seeds indoors', gardening frenzy.

We have planted 5 different varieties of tomatoes, including these, called "Golden Queen":

We also planted scarlett runner beans...thay have taken off in such a big way that we will need to set up a trellis indoors and slowly take them out on warm days to harden them off.

We planted purple carrots:

Sevreal different varieties of Coleus

And beets of course...

Now...if this snow would all melt, we'd be a good shape to start!!!

COME SPRING!!!

Taste of my own medicine

2009-03-18T22:36:00.000-07:00

I have to make a confession; I rarely have a massage.

I know. It is ironic... especially considering that I am a massage therapist and am constantly counselling people on self care.

I went, today, for a massage. I found a clinic that provides childcare.

It was excruciating. Seriously... my rhomboids are so tender right now that the soft, well-padded couch hurts.

I am a wimp. I hate painful massages and I try to never inflict pain on people. I try to coax muscles into relaxation... never force them.

The lovely, well-intentioned girl that massaged me today seemed to hit every tender spot I have (and there are a lot of them)... on those that are particularly tender she used her thumbs and knuckles.

Why can't I find a massage therapist that's gentle? One that gently coaxes my muscles into giving in? One that uses heat and stretching and repetition?

In short...why can't I find me?

I know that I sound completely self-absorbed right now...but it is a known fact that most massage therapists massage the way that they like to be massaged.

I just want to be massaged to sleep and wake up loose and refreshed...is that too much to ask??

Anyone have a great therapist they want to share?

2009-03-11T22:48:00.001-07:00

So, this morning, like many days in the past 6 months, Parker decided he wanted to stay home.

In the past I have fought him on this...after all, he is only 6.

This week I decided to start to seriously consider homeschooling...seriously.

We picked the best, most holistic, laid back school we could find (the kindergarteners drink herbal tea and have hand and foot rubs before naptime everyday...Seriously!)...we were looking for the next best thing to homeschooling and we actually found it in the Calgary Waldorf School...but it just isn't right for Parker.

I know. Everyone keeps telling me that it is a rite of passge, school, and that he needs to go so he can learn social skills and how to function in the world. But...The thing is, he functions great in the world. He makes friends really easily - just not at school.

What takes him forever to do at school (and becomes a long drawn out, negative process) takes 15 minutes at home...no fuss, no muss. When we play with friends he is calm, happy, well-behaved...from what one of his teachers was saying, he is socially "awkward" and doesn't understand social cues.

How can a kid be happy, funtional and well-liked at home and in his own social circle, but struggle so much in Kindergarten?

It all seems seriously strange to me...and SO not worth what we have been paying to send him there.

We applied to a local Charter school and will hear next week if he has been accepted...but, to be honest, I think we have made up our minds.

I think we're homeschooling...seriously.

Heaven help me.

The Weekend to End Breast Cancer

2009-03-10T07:44:00.000-07:00

So, Smooch decided yesterday to walk in the Kid's K! We signed him up and sent out an invitation to his Facebook group.

In less than 12 hours he received more than $170 in donations!

When I showed him this morning...he fainted (I am not the only Drama Queen in our family) and then started planning how he was going to make even more money for the Kid'sK.

So far he has decided to put a banner up on a local pedestrian overpass and find a corporate sponsor!!

Will keep you updated!

http://www.endcancer.ca/site/TR?px=2913154&fr_id=1327&pg=personal

Laughing gas

2009-03-09T23:08:00.000-07:00

Ok, have I ever told you how much I LOVE laughing gas??

I LOVE it...seriously...I wish I could get one of those big tanks for personal use (like when I need to take the edge off because the boys painted each other's faces with sharpie markers...true story, I swear).

I became intimately aquainted with Nitrous Oxide during the 31 hour labour and delivery of Smooch. We were happily reunited during the much shorter L&D of Noggin.

Well, today I watched Smooch giggle his way through several dental proceedures.

After choosing a grape flavoured "elephant nose" and slowly allowing the nose to be lowered on his nose he proceeded to give us the thumbs up...about 2 dozen times in half an hour...all the while, giggling about the strangest things. I giggled because he gigled and it was a really nice trip to the dentist...very entertaining.

I highly recommend Dr. Kari Stein ... her team works like a well-oiled machine, she does not do unneccesary proceedures (she actually billed us $200 less than her projected amount because once she got in, things looked better than she thought!) and she is fun and caring.

Different kind of Baby Blues

2009-03-05T15:28:00.000-08:00

I want to have another baby. There. I've said it.

I know it sounds crazy, especially given my recent rambling and ranting on the challenges surrounding Smooch.

Alan is completely against it. He thinks I am crazy for even considering it.

He thinks: we have two kids out of diapers, one trained through the night and both can dress and feed themselves...why add another 3+ years of poo/sleepless nights/baby stuff/expense when we are finally moving out of that stage.

All I can think is that I know I will regret it forever if I don't.

I will be 35 in June and think that if I want to do this again, it needs to be soon.

Soo.....how do you feel with your current number of children? Any little nagging thoughts of more? Is your partner satisfied with the amount you have??

Be my devil's advocate.

Grandmas & Grandpas

2009-03-04T10:02:00.000-08:00

So, my Dad and his wife are currently living a zillion miles away. The country they are living in as expats is called Qatar. It is in the middle East, a peninsula off the coast of Saudi Arabia. They called thismorning to wish noggin a happy 4th birthday. He will actually be 4 on Saturday, but my Dad has developed wanderlust and cannot last more than a few weeks before wandering off to another country for a few days. My Step-mom, Kathy was telling Smooch all about how well camels smile and afterward sent us some magnificent pictures of their trips to Thailand and Egypt last year. I thought I would post afew...here they are:

Spring Fever

2009-03-03T08:33:00.000-08:00

Ok...so, how about a little sunshine in view of my recently gloomy rantings and ramblings?

I am DYING for green grass. The paperwhites on my windowsill have grown and blossomed (Alan couldn't stand the smell so he cut all the blooms off...lol), the boys planted tiny patches of green grass, I have been sprouting alfalfa.

IT ISN'T ENOUGH!!

I am itching to visit sunnyside and plan my garden for this year.

Last year we planted a few new things that I absolutely LOVED. Purple Morning Glories, Scarlett Runner Beans and purple potatoes. While our harvest was less than bountiful, the boys enjoyed watching everything grow and loved picking beans off the vine and digging out the potatoes at year end.

This year I think we will double up and plant twice as many seeds. We have chain link fencing and it makes the perfect trellis for climbing plants and veggies.

A personal favorite that I think we will plant this year are sweet peas. I purchased a packet of a beautiful varigated multi-coloured variety and am just waiting for the Mother's Day weekend to plant them.

So...do you garden? Veggies, flowers or both? What are YOUR favourites? Any hints you want to share? Are you dying to get your hands dirty?

I think we will take a little drive to sunnyside, just for a green fix.

Dealing

2009-03-02T16:44:00.000-08:00

So, I am dealing. I am not as emotional or upset about this whole thing. My husband called the school and spoke to the pedagological administrator and expressed our concerns. She spoke to the teacher and the teacher will be calling tonight to "clarify".

I have joined a great homeschooling group here in Calgary and hope to make a decision in the next few weeks about Smooch's fall school plans.

At this point, I have no idea.

Apparently Smooch has something called "Asynchronous Development". He has what looks like Sensory Integration disorder and is gifted and the combination of the two are very challenging.

Just thinking about what this means for him over the next 12-15 years and possibly throught his life, well...it exhausts me.

I am overwhelmed, anxious, mad, impatient and likely boring you with all this ranting and raving...I have no idea what this all means for Smooch...for our family and how to help him.

I feel stuck.

Heartbroken anguish

2009-02-25T07:23:00.001-08:00

Ok, so I am PMSing, just a little, but I think I would be nearly as upset at any other time...

There has always been something about Smooch. Something intangible. Something I could never identify or put into words.

When he was a baby I constantly thought he would stop breathing in his sleep. As a toddler, he was fearless and I worried that he'd run out into traffic. I was over protective and coddling...I get that.

In the past 16 months, there have been three occasions when he was so ill I didn't know if he would make it through the night. I sat beside him, in anguish, heartbroken.

Smooch has always been "That Kid".

He also developed language at an inordinately early age. He said odd things that were so profoud...just a little glimpse at the complicated innerworkings of his little mind. I knew he was different. I tried to quash the feeling of anxiety that I could feel, burgeoning in my heart.

I agonized over the choice to send him to school. The protective Mama-bear inside me screamed with worry when we sent him to kindergarten. I knew he would be mis-understood, likely labelled. I knew that it would take someone who truly cares for him, to create an atmosphere of warm calm, to gently encourage him.

One of Smooch's teachers is that person. Ms. Vivian is warm. When I see her with Smooch, I know he is in kind, gentle hands. I know she "sees" him, his gentle, exceptional nature. I trust her.

I wish I could say the same for his other teacher (One is for morning, one for afternoon), but I cannot.

From day one I could feel her judgement and annoyance with Smooch. There is no amount of forced smiling that covers those negative emotions. Yet, when we sat down for "parent-teacher conversations" and expressed that we did not think the school was the right place for him, she brushed off our concerns.

The kicker is that I had her fill out an evaluation for Smooch, as we are having him assessed. The evaluation was so different from any of the others that were filled out for him...painting him as a defiant, socially awkward and average. I am disgusted that I allowed someone, with such a negative view of my child, spend so much time with him...and paid her to do it.

She does not know that Smooch's VIQ has been assessed in the 94th percentile. She does not know that his OIQ is in the high 80th percentile. She sees him as average, with an active imagination.

Had she been honest with me, I would have pulled him out of the school. Now, we are on the hook financially until June for a program I feel does not inspire and motivate him, or serve his best interests.

My mind is SCREAMING to pull him out. If I had my druthers about me, I would write a letter, right now, to the principal of his school. However, I am so emotiontioal that I can hardly stop crying for long enough to speak, and know that I would have to discuss this with her.

I am so torn and so sad...I have no idea what to do.

*UPDATE*

We have received the other questionairre from Smooch's morning class and are happy to say it is much more positive and represents the Smooch WE see and know.

I am feeling much calmer and more hopeful. Stay tuned.

444 Meme

2009-02-20T21:15:00.000-08:00

Ok, having been tagged by Jo-Ann from Where will his little foot take him? for a 444 Meme, I can honestly say I was very curious about which picture would come up...:)

Here is Noggin, in October '08, having his teeth cleaned at Dr. Oriel's office.

I was prepared for a fight, but he gave none...he was strangely compliant and almost appears to be sleeping in this pic (he wasn't).

The funny thing was that, despite wanting, desperately, to have the teeth of a pirate (green and mossy), he was the only one who didn't have a cavity or other issue that needed to be dealt with. His teeth were perfect!

Hmm...who do I tag...Jenn, Angela, Kris??

Hamsters...Part two

2009-02-15T22:25:00.000-08:00

Our hamster, which the boys lovingly named Ralph, after Ralph the ferret of Stuart Maclean fame, turned out to be the perfect pet!

He was gentle and inquisitive and loved to roll around in the plastic ball ($13) to explore our home. Smooch did a great job of feeding him daily and helping to clean his cage every week. I think Alan and I played with him more than anyone (being that he is a nocturnal animal).

I did notice, however, that he seemed to hoard a great deal of food in his sleeping quarters...and, come to think of it, he was losing a bit of weight too!

I chalked it up to the new, fancy-schmancy hamster wheel his cage included.

Unfortunately, despite now owning a cage that cost well over $100, Ralph developed wet tail.

Ignoring my nursing efforts (which included feeding him pedialyte from an eyedropper and cutting up one of my facecloths for bedding) Ralph died, in his bed, just shy of 2 months from the date we bought him.

I didn't realise, initially, that Ralph was dead. I heard the boys prodding at him to wake up and wondering why he was so tired. When I peered into his cage I was struck by a sick feeling. He looked a little too "relaxed"...in fact, his foot was in an odd, unnatural position.

I told the boys that Ralph was, in fact, feeling a little "under the weather" and that I was taking him to the vet.

Alan and I then spent most of the day driving around the city, trying to find a medium-sized all-grey hamster.

You would think this would be an easy feat. Nope.

I found one grey, short-haired hamster in Calgary. It already had wet-tail, so I passed on buying him.

I lay awake all night worrying about how I would explain the concept of death to Smooch. How would he feel? Would it hurt his little psyche?

I waited until he came home from school the next day and gently told him that Ralph did not make it (but that the vet said he looked very well-loved and cared for).

He cried, I cried, we talked about all the lovely little things we liked about Ralph and cried some more.

The next morning Smooch came into my room and announced that after a very difficult night of missing Ralph and feeling sad...he was ready for a new hamster! Even better, he'd decided on a new name for his new hamster - Reepicheep (of Narnia fame).

Kids are so resiliant.

Sickies

2009-02-15T22:21:00.000-08:00

So, we have been sick, here in the bliss house, since November.

Yes, I wrote all about our adventures in poxland...lovely stuff. That little lark was closely followed by the "OH MY GOD...I think I want to die" influenza that Alan so kindly bestowed upon me. Actually, he stayed home for a week and slept, passed it on to me and then went back to work on the Monday morning while I lay in bed with a fever of 103, chills and rigors.

I had to bribe my 6 year old with yogurt and wine gums to wipe his 3 year old brother's bum because I literally could not walk. (Yes, I am currently awaiting my "Mother of the Year" award. I will let you know when it arrives...should be any day now.).

We managed to avoid tha lovely stomach flu/projectile vomitting, explosive diarhea bug that seemed to show up at all of our friend's homes all through November and December.

Turns out it was just waiting until the morning of Smooch's 6th birthday party to rear it's ugly head.

So, after the boys vommitted on various beds, carpets and my expensive, 'hand-tied and tufted by little girls in remote villiages' Pakastani hallway runner, I convinced Alan to drive to walmart and buy an upholstry cleaner. I have no idea how we survived this long without one. It is a wonderful thing.

So...that seemed like the end of it. We all got well, there were no bodily fluids expelled on any piece of furniture for days and days and then Noggin developed a fever/cough that lasted over a week...stopped eating and dropped 10% of his body weight.

I have been feeding him cheese and nutrigrain bars to try and get him back up to the 39 lbs he was at 3 weeks ago...I am just slightly worried about the poor gaffer.

Toothaches and dentists and Hamsters...OH MY!

2009-02-15T21:50:00.001-08:00

Ok, so, someone pointed out to me that I haven't blogged in awhile...actually, awhile is since November, so back into bliss I go...

Smooch had a toothache in early December. We had him booked in with a pediatric dentist in February, but he was complaining about his tooth hurting so we took him to our regular dentist. I could forsee this being a challenge, so I had to think of something big...HUGE...with which to bribe him.

I promised Smooch that if he co-operated with the dentist (who actually had to do a pulpotomy...like a mini root canal) that we would go directly to the pet store and buy him a hamster.

Smooch was the most co-operative pediatric pulpotomy patient in the history of dentistry...giving me the thumbs up, periodically, to stop my from crying and tearing my hair out.

As promised, we drove directly to Petland.

I had no idea that hamsters required so many accessories;

Habitrail Ovo Studio Cage - $65
Hamster food/wet tail medicine - $13
Shavings/Chew toys/Salt lick - $12
Old grey hamster - Free with purchase

Having your 6 year old stop crying about his tooth hurting = Priceless

Quarantine...

2008-11-28T09:23:00.001-08:00

Ok, it has been nearly a month of our self-imposed quarantine.

Let me countdown the top 5 "you will never let them do this again" chickenpox boredom cures:

5 - LET THEM MAKE BREAKFAST.

The breakfast in question was a well balanced combo of halloween candy, hummous and green beans, served to me, in bed, while watching Toy Story (a long time personal favourite).

4 - THE MOVIE DAY.

So, I thought this was a great idea. What better way to keep them quiet and recuperative than to play movies, all day, back to back while they lay on my bed and eat. Please understand, the boys RARELY watch TV, movies or anything resembling TV or movies...we did this in an attempt to protect them from the insidiousness of corporate commercialism and to help them develop an imagination.

The reality of the situation was that after an hour of silence (while I was happily relaxing on the main floor, reading my new favourite Author Stephanie Meyer) the boys came tromping down the stairs, COVERED in about $150 of "Bare Minerals" makeup and most of my new lip-plumping gloss (Guess what Mama? It tastes like CINNAMON!!!!!).

Damn imaginations.

3 - CUT OUT SHAPES.

I realise that on first glance #3's title does not conjure up images of distaster...but let me ask you this: WHY did I teach my boys to use SCISSORS?? Smooch cut his own hair, then obliged Noggin (who needs all the hair he can grow to cover his huge cranium), all while I tried to have a 5 minute private bathroom break.

Note to self: NEVER again close the bathroom door.

2 - BATH BOMBS

Why I allowed them anything with the word BOMB in the title is beyond me. These brightly coloured bath treats tint the water, but not your body...unless you use an entire package while your Mom goes to get your jammies.

Enough said.

1 - FAMILY FACE PAINTING.

Let me start by thanking Gymboree for making such vibrantly coloured face paint crayons. The boys found the face paint somewhere (I am still not sure where because I thought I threw them out shortly after we received them) and decided that we should take turns paiting each other's faces.

Not to detract from my earlier Thank-you, but just a note to other parents...Gymboree Red is permanent (who needs tattoed makeup?), while Gymboree Black is demi-permanent and when scribbled around the delicate undereye area and removed with cold cream, resembles a black-eye for approximately 9 days.

So...all in all, the Chickenpox, while not the itchy, feverish illness of legends (at least not here), has been a barrel of fun around here.

Noggin may still be contagious, so come on over!

With a pox pox here and a...

2008-11-24T20:19:00.001-08:00

Noggin has the Chickenpox.

I am not surprised in the least as Smooch's spots showed up in the night two weeks ago.

I noticed Noggin's first two spots this afternoon as we were cuddling on the couch.

He is quite proud of them and pulled his shirt up so Daddy could see when he arrived home from work. We're hoping that his case is as mild as Smooch's was...nothing but the spots, really.

We've chosen not to vaccinate the boys, at least for the time being, and have been hoping they would catch them sooner than later...so Iam so glad that within the week, it will be all over!

Lifetime immunity is a wonderful thing!

Crappy Parents

2008-10-26T14:12:00.000-07:00

I can scarcely believe that it is nearly November.

Smooch has been in school now for two months...he is so happy there. I, on the other hand, am struggling.

I have worked hard to keep Smooch innocent.

I've avoided using sarcasm with him and, anyone who knows me well knows how difficult this is for me.

Alan and I have practiced manners with the boys, tried to keep them from being innundated with commercial messages, encouraged them to talk about their feelings, to be kind and loving.

It's at this point that I must complain, just a little.

A message to SOME parents of Kinder-garten and Grade One children; Your kids are mean. Cynicism, sarcasm and eye-rolling in a 5-7 year old is NOT attractive. Bullying is even less so. It is a token of your parenting that your children are unkind and rude. Pull up your socks and parent.

There...I said it...and I meant it. I just want to add that there are plenty of wonderful families at Smooch's school.

Other than that, we are all enjoying the Waldorf school, especially me...I have learned to knit, under taken a large volunteer project and met some amazing Moms!

Fall is here

2008-08-30T22:34:00.000-07:00

I can nearly smell it...fall creeps in quietly, but it can't hide from me...I know it's here...I haven't failed to notice the tips of some leaves changing...the wind and the rain...I being to get the itch to stay home...cook...sew even(?)...

I LOVE this time of the year!!!

Smooth...

2008-08-25T13:56:00.000-07:00

I love days that go off without a hitch. Today has been one of those kind of days.

I'be been reading a new book - "Have a New Kid by Friday" by Dr. Kevin Leman.

Don't get me wrong. I think my kids are fantastic...in my opinion, books like these deal far more with parenting problems than with kid problems.

I am a softie and let things go until I yell...there, I admitted it and admitting is, apparently, the first step.

The idea behind the book is that you should only have to ask your kids to do something (or stop doing something) once. It gives strategies for parents to turn kids who tune out into kids who listen...and reasons to stay calm. I think most of us can use some of these.

I am already using some of these strategies successfully and I can honestly say that I have not yelled once today...so far, so good.

We tidied the upstairs and throughly cleaned the kitchen, had a playdate, a snack and played with playdough. Visited the park, had lunch and put a loaf of bread in the breadmaker. Liam voluntarily pooped on the potty (which is good because it would have been messy) then I went upstairs with the boys and told them it was time for a nap...they are still sleeping.

Alan is due home in 2 hours and we will have a salad, fresh loaf of bread and soup for dinner.

I love smooth days...

Mumbo Jumbo Part Deux....

2008-08-22T23:36:00.001-07:00

So...remember Aunt Moira and the funeral?

I was wrong...SO incredibly wrong...bad things don't happen in threes...they just HAPPEN.

Smooch had a headache last week...actually, both boys did. It was HOT outside and we played a LOT in the sun (but always with a hat and sunscreen). I chalked it up to the heat and maybe a little dehydration. I upped the boys fluids and Noggin seemed to feel better...but Smooch, not so much.

Saturday, while I was at a massage appointment, Alan, Smooch and Noggin attended a birthday party. They were there approx. 2 hours before noggin started to HOWL. He had a headache...on the way to pick me up, Noggin announced that he was going to throw up and promptly did...in a bag, thankfully.

He spent the next 12 hours gagging and retching. Eventually he stopped and was fine. That is Noggin for you, he gets sick and it's over.

Sunday night, Smooch goes to bed and all is well...he wakes me at 4 am, vomiting, with a headache and...(insert mumbo jumbo here)...stiff neck.

I get him some Tylenol and Advil (both work great together for migraines), we sit on the front step for an hour admiring the Tamarack in our yard while he vomits in an old ice cream bucket and eventually he is ready to go back to sleep.

He wakes up, no more vomiting, eats breakfast and I take him into the chiropractor (who does very gentle, non-manual adjustments) to see about the headaches and stiff neck. After his adjustment, he begins to throw up again...I take him back for another adjustment...his headache returns.

By 7pm I am convinced that he has Meningitis and take him to the Alberta Children's Hospital.

I was right.

After bloodwork, an IV and lumbar puncture it is confirmed that Smooch has viral meningitis.

Viral meningitis is caused by everyday cold, flu or entero-viruses and there is no vaccination to prevent it...not that it would help as Smooch is completely unvaccinated.

He is hospitalised and spends 3 days recuperating. He loves ACH...you get to lay in bed all day, watch treehouse, and they bring you food!

We are home now and he has no long-term effects...no short-term effects actually...he is completely back to his normal self.

Moms, listen to your intuition...it will not steer you wrong...

Oh and Aunt Moira...you suck.

Potty-training Part-2...Poop

2008-07-23T15:50:00.000-07:00

Ok, so Noggin has been doing really well with the whole potty-training thing. We went out today, sans pull-up and he stayed dry.

Of course, I did put him on the potty every 15-20 minutes...which is no easy feat since he fell into a public toilet last month after his portable potty seat broke.

He completed a respectable #1 and spent about 1/2 an hour playing enthusiastically with Smooch, M & L when I lost sight of him for a few moments.

When I did finally catch sight of him, he was standing by a railing, shifting and looking somewhat conspicuous and uncomfortable.

"Oh CRAP"...I said to my friend, S, who was seated beside me, supervising her two completely potty-trained angels.

So Noggin and Mama began the long trip out to the car to retrieve clean clothing, then the bathroom where the pants he was wearing (thankfully old, worn-out sweatpants with a cuff that just kept holding on) found a new home in the garbage.

So, today I am grateful for several things;

1 - Extra clothes
2 - Paper Towel
3 - Foaming hand cleanser
4 - Good friends who are willing to watch (and discipline, if need be) other children when disaster strikes.
5 - (and really, most important), I am grateful for the close relationship I have with my kids, and that I know, just from a facial expression, everything that I need to.

Motherhood rocks...even when it gets crappy.

The "Rules" for families

2008-07-20T08:35:00.000-07:00

We are at a crossroads in the Urbane House.

Do we establish a formal set of rules for our home, complete with consequences for breaking said rules?

Do we try and "talk it out" every time an incident occurs??

A combination of both?

I think the lack of formal house rules leads to problems...at least in our home.

Nature Table

2008-07-19T14:25:00.000-07:00

The last few weeks we have been working on our nature table.

We hand-dyed some nice wooden candle-holders and went for a nature-walk or two...adding interesting things we found...

This week we encountered a friendly squirrel, under a large Spruce and Smooch had the presence of mind to toss him an unchewed spruce cone... We could almost see the look of surprise on his face as he glanced back and forth between the cone and Smooch...finally grabbing it and scampering up the tree to have a bite to eat.

We gathered spruce cones, a lonely dandilion and a few twigs, swatted mosquitoes, played in the park with a group of children and eventually made our way home for a snack and to sketch what we found.

The Big Cook

2008-07-19T11:49:00.000-07:00

I come from a family of cooks.

My Dad is a Chef and has taught professional cooking for the past 20 years. He makes Gordon Ramsey look like Carrot Top, but he is a great cook. He has temporarily vacated the cookingarena in favour of browner pastures...he currently lives in Qatar and teaches marketing comm.

My Mum is an amazing cook and just has a knack for knowing what flavours go together and how much of something a person needs to make a dish taste just right.

I grew up making deviled eggs, piping chox pastry and washing A LOT of dishes...

One slight problem, however, is that I never learned to cook small...I just cook big. I think that's why the concept of "The Big Cook" appeals to me. Cook all your meals for a month in one day.

So this week I prepared for a big cook of my own. I purchased about $400 worth of groceries, a new stock pot and came up with my own recipes (ok, so I rarely use a recipe more than once when I am cooking).

Last night I made 100 Swedish Meatballs, cooked and frozen.

Today is Beef & Barley Soup, Split Pea & Ham Soup and A HUGE pot of Chili.

Tomorrow will be Turkey and Wild Rice Soup and one of my personal faves "Happy Go Leeky" soup from the "Crazy Plates" cookbook.

Of course, to get the beef for the beef/barley soup, I needed to cook a sirloin tip roast...so we'll be having THAT for dinner tonight...and a Turkey dinner tomorrow!

From the look of things today, I could write my own cookbook and call it "The Bigger Cook"...I think by the time we are finished, we will have approx. 2-3 months worth of meals in our deep freeze. Add a salad, or veggies, biscuits or buns and Voila...meals in minutes.

Kick 'em when they're down....

2008-07-17T06:16:00.001-07:00

Why is it that some people insist on adding insult to injury?

A friend in crisis asked for help during a difficult and emotional time. Someone she did not know, who had never met her proceeded to go off on a lengthy tirade, criticising her choices, making judgements based on little to no information. She labelled her relationship with a close family member, blaming her for all the trouble she is experiencing.

Why are some women so incredibly eager to judge and give their opinions about things they don't understand?

Why do they compare, snub and kick each other when what we really need to do is pick each other up, dust each other off and understand that we're not all that different?

UPDATE:

Said 'Negative Nellie' made amends by admitting she did not have the whole story and APOLOGISING!!

There is something very special about someone being humble enough to recognise when they have done something wrong, admit it and apologise. The healing begins....

Waldorf Education

2008-07-16T19:47:00.000-07:00

The last few months have seen me agonizing over the issue of Smooch's fall school plans.

French immersion?

Montessouri?

Spanish??

Charming Buddhist "Instilling Goodness" school adjacent to the monestary (we are not buddhists...but there is something so nice about them...no?)?

Half-day, full-day, 4-day, everyday....

The options were endless...but the choice seemed impossible...until...

I was reminded of an amazing preschool I attempted to register Smooch in but never quite made it.

We spent countless hours digging in their GIGANTIC sandbox...exploring their vegetable garden and flying a kite on their field...

It was our local Waldorf school.

As soon as I thought about Smooch attending this school I KNEW. Immediately I emailed the school...only to find out they'd just filled the last spot. I asked to be placed on the waiting list, took in the application and then arrived home to work some Manifestative Magic....

I wrote on a piece of paper "Smooch is a Waldorf Student".

I put the paper up in a prominent place in our home, where I saw it several times a day.

I gently harrassed the kind woman in charge of admitting and within two weeks we had an interview with Ms. Vivian...the lovely, soft-spoken teacher of the Senior kindergarten Class!

After the interview, she offered Smooch a spot in her class!!

I have been at peace about it ever since.

More on this fabulous pedagogy to come....

Bad things happen in threes....

2008-07-15T16:12:00.000-07:00

I have heard people say that bad things happen in threes.

I've always though it was some sort of old-world mumbo-jumbo. You know, something Great Aunt Moira whispered to your Mum at a distant relative's funeral.

Basically, crazy talk.

Smooch had his tonsils out the first week of May. He was FABULOUS!! He ate more popsicles than any post-tonsilectomy/adenoidectomy patient in the history of surgery.

The next morning he was up, leaping of the top bunk of the bunk beds, laughing hysterically and chasing Noggin all over the house.

I though that I was one of the special few parents who were spared the 10-14 day recovery period from said surgery.

I thought wrong.

Apparently the pain-killer/narcotics they administer in the hospital last about 48 hours...then all hell breaks loose. We had a week of constant crying and refusal to eat/drink anything.

The day I might have described as a turning-point in his healing process was actually the jumping-off point into mumbo-jumbo bad thing # two...

I hear Smooch playing quietly(!) on the top bunk in his room. I breathe a (premature) sigh of relief. Seconds later I hear a loud thud followed closely by a howl.

"I BROKE MY Aaaarrrrrmmmm!!!!!".

I hug him, reassuring him that his arm is, in fact, not broken. To help him feel better I tell him we are leaving for open play time at a local gym.

I sat for an hour, watching him play, all the while cradling a limp arm by his side. Four hours, a large helping of mom-Guilt and a trip to the ACH later and it is confirmed - Smooch's wrist is broken in two places.

The next day doesn't get much better (insert eerie music and mumbo-jumbo #three here) when he wakes up with an earache that is confirmed by our doc as an ear-infection.

After that, we leave on vacation. It turns out that the outdoor waterslide/pool at the resort we picked (just for that reason) is non-functional.

Mumbo-jumbo # Four?

Maybe Aunt Moira was onto something....

Pee

2008-04-25T08:17:00.000-07:00

Potty-training a 3 year-old is like...er...well, after the last few months I feel like I would rather put hot sauce in my eyes.

Noggin has been stubbornly resistant to using the potty. He likes the warm sensation of a load in his pull-up. He doesn't notice the plants wilting and other children fleeing from him in record numbers.

The last couple of days he finally seems to be clueing in. He sits on the potty and pees...don't ask about the other business...I don't wish to discuss that.

I have been using bribery on him, of course. "Noggin, if you do a poop on the potty, Mama will give you...er...10 CHOCOLATES!!". He gets 1 Chocolate for a pee...so I figured I'd better up the ante to see if it brough about some results for the messy stuff.

So far, nada.

This morning he sat on the potty for 20 minutes, got up, put on some undies and announced "Mom, I have PEE on my foot!".

Any parent who has potty-trained a child dreads these kinds of statements. We know what they mean - Pee on foot=Pee on floor. Pee on floor=Pee down hallway.

Basically there is just pee everywhere.

Noggin opens his bottom drawer and selects a pair of waffle pants because they have dogs on them. He slides them on. 5 minutes later he announces "MAMA...I'M LEAKING!"

I mistakenly answer; "NOGGIN...go leak in the POTTY!!".

I hear him pad down the hallway and realise too late that he is leaving wet footprints on the tile.

Schooling

2008-04-24T18:49:00.000-07:00

I have been avoiding this issue.

Smooch is 5.5 in September and I've delayed sending him to school as long as I can.

I've been avoiding making the decision because I KNOW what he needs. I KNOW what is best for him. I KNOW the best-case scenario.

Preschool was easy. He went and liked it, for the most part. When he became ill with Kawasaki Disease last fall, it was no biggie for me to pull him out to recuperate. No, the problem came later, when I realised how much I enjoy having him at home.

You may well ask why this came as a surprise to me.

At age three he was a complete monster. There was not a child-lock that could contain him. He routinely locked me in his room or out of the house. I could not have a shower in the morning, or while alone at home, for fear that he would 1.) Make scrambled eggs on the kitchen tile, 2.) pump half a bottle of alcohol-based hand-sanitizer down his gullet or 3.) find a razor-sharp kitchen knife with which to slice a tomato.

Oh, and he didn't sleep...ever.

Having him in preschool 4 full days a week was like a new lease on life for me. I spent time with Noggin, uninturrupted. I peed, or even showered without fearing a scene from CSI awaited me outside the bathroom door. I napped. I cooked. I had a hair cut.

Keeping Smooch home to get well came out of neccesity. He had two confirmed cases of Kawasaki Disease. Now, one case is rare. Two cases in a child older than 3 is nearly unheard of.

Now he is well. His coronary arteries are back within normal. The fliud in his pericardium is gone. He is no longer on blood thinners. No peeling fingers. He is well.

Over the past 6 months, he has transformed before my eyes. Before he was impossibly impulsive, now he is spontanious and thoughtful. Where before he was stubborn and resistant to changes, now he is eager and flexible. Every day he says something new that astounds and humbles me. I look at him and realise how amazing and engaged and happy he is with life and learning.

There is absolutely no reason for me to not send him to school in September...except I know conventional education is all wrong for him. I need the perfect school...I just have no idea what that is.

Update to follow...I hope.

Bliss

2008-04-20T08:34:00.000-07:00

There is nothing like starting the day wedged between a 3 year old, who insists on sharing your pillow, and a 5 year old with sleep apnea who snores like a bandsaw. You should try it!

It was in such a position I found myself this morning.

Deciding that I, too, wanted to sleep comfortably, and realising there were several perfectly unoccupied beds down the hall, I decided to take action.

Carefully and gracefully I extricated myself from the jumble of limbs, blankets and stuffed animals and wiggled down to the foot of the bed.

Looking back I realised why I'd been so crowded. My dear, kind and very deaf husband was sprawled across more than his half of our ample-sized bed. Leaving the remaining space for me and two preschoolers.

The boys room is a quiet, cool place. Soft music plays all night. An ever-changing glow-lamp casts a myriad of colours on the wall and ceiling. The best thing about it is that...yes, it is empty.

Snuggled into bed, it didn't take long for me to drift off...and it took even less time to feel the inevitable poke on the cheek.

Noggin wants a cuddle and I am, technically, sleeping in his bed.

I move over and make space while he gets comfortable. He has his own pillow, but prefers to share mine. I open my eyes to see him staring at me, inches away.

He giggles and closes his eyes.

In moments, we are both fast asleep, again.