Thursday, April 24, 2008


I have been avoiding this issue.

Smooch is 5.5 in September and I've delayed sending him to school as long as I can.

I've been avoiding making the decision because I KNOW what he needs. I KNOW what is best for him. I KNOW the best-case scenario.

Preschool was easy. He went and liked it, for the most part. When he became ill with Kawasaki Disease last fall, it was no biggie for me to pull him out to recuperate. No, the problem came later, when I realised how much I enjoy having him at home.

You may well ask why this came as a surprise to me.

At age three he was a complete monster. There was not a child-lock that could contain him. He routinely locked me in his room or out of the house. I could not have a shower in the morning, or while alone at home, for fear that he would 1.) Make scrambled eggs on the kitchen tile, 2.) pump half a bottle of alcohol-based hand-sanitizer down his gullet or 3.) find a razor-sharp kitchen knife with which to slice a tomato.

Oh, and he didn't sleep...ever.

Having him in preschool 4 full days a week was like a new lease on life for me. I spent time with Noggin, uninturrupted. I peed, or even showered without fearing a scene from CSI awaited me outside the bathroom door. I napped. I cooked. I had a hair cut.

Keeping Smooch home to get well came out of neccesity. He had two confirmed cases of Kawasaki Disease. Now, one case is rare. Two cases in a child older than 3 is nearly unheard of.

Now he is well. His coronary arteries are back within normal. The fliud in his pericardium is gone. He is no longer on blood thinners. No peeling fingers. He is well.

Over the past 6 months, he has transformed before my eyes. Before he was impossibly impulsive, now he is spontanious and thoughtful. Where before he was stubborn and resistant to changes, now he is eager and flexible. Every day he says something new that astounds and humbles me. I look at him and realise how amazing and engaged and happy he is with life and learning.

There is absolutely no reason for me to not send him to school in September...except I know conventional education is all wrong for him. I need the perfect school...I just have no idea what that is.

Update to follow...I hope.

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